Stupid joke I made up this morning...

[TWITCHDOCTOR]

What do you call a Hentia Shmup that gets you all "excited"?
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A Dictator (dick-tate) get it?
Ok, ok, so its not that funny. I know one of you dorks will figure a way out to share that one at the water cooler!!

[CIT]

WOW! That one is really bad! WOOOOW!

[Acid King]

It flips your penis on its side?

[TWITCHDOCTOR]

It flips your penis on its side?

Nah man, TATE...as in vertical!? (stand up tall)

[~Kid Icarus~]

What did Ryu & Ken order at the chippy?
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HADOKEN' chips.










(Haddock & Chips? Geddit?)

[captain ahar]

^holy shit best joke ever.

[Klatrymadon]

HADOKEN' chips.

[ROBOTRON]

How many shmuppers does it take to screw in a....

no.

Three shmuppers walk into a bar. Bartender says what'll ya have? The Cave player says: "I'll have a....."

no.

Q. Why did the shmupper cross the road?

A. To get to an arcade.

- DHURRRR....

[Samudra]

What did Ryu & Ken order at the chippy?
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HADOKEN' chips.










(Haddock & Chips? Geddit?)














:oops: :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops:

Would someone care to explain?

[Leeram]

In England we eat a lot of Fish and Chips, a bit like the Americans eat burgers. We have Chippies, that is, shops that sell fish and chips.

Chips are not what Americans call chips (a bit like football isn't what Americans call football). America might be bigger than Great Britain, but it is wrong all the same.

Anyway a chip is a chopped up potato deep fried in fat. A bit like fries only thicker and with a name that doesn't involve anything to do with France, which is what us Brits like. An absense of anything French is usually a bonus. Also they are not made out of re-constituted dog turds, there's actually potato in chips.

Fish swim in the sea, and being as we live on an island and have good access to the sea, we eat them.

Anyway the fish has a coating added to it called batter before it is also deep fried in said fat, and most chippies give a selection of fish to batter, namely large cod, small, cod, large haddock, small haddock.

In most chippies you can ask for Fish and Chips, which will mean you will get Cod and Chips because that is the cheaper and more common option. However some people make the distinction, pay a bit more money, and ask for Haddock and Chips.

"Haddock and" , when said in a British accent sounds not unlike Hadoken. Because we rarely say the full AND we usually contract it to be N (hence a lot of chippies write "Fish 'n' Chips" on the menu, if you could call fish, chips, mushy peas and a battered Mars bar a menu.

In the Streetfighter series the Ryu and Ken characters have a move to which they say the word "hadoken", it's Japanese, kind of. Japan is a country that is not in or near America, a bit like Great Britain.

Thus using Ryu and Ken walking into a chippy combined with the haddock and chips creates the central part of the joke.

Cheers

Leeram

[EOJ]

A Dictator (dick-tate) get it?

This joke doesn't work too well, considering TATE is pronounced "ta-tay".

[umi]

A Dictator (dick-tate) get it?

This joke doesn't work too well, considering TATE is pronounced "ta-tay".

In Japanese yes... but in regular English speech, it'd sound stupid (it makes more sense to sound it out in english phonetics). Also, TA-TE in Japanese is not "ta-tay", but more of a "ta-teh" (short punchy "teh", not an elongated "tay"). So try fitting that into conversation... :P

p.s. Yes, that first joke was really stupid... heh.

[BulletMagnet]

Japan is a country that is not in or near America, a bit like Great Britain.

Someone's gotta sig that.

Three shmuppers walk into a bar. Bartender says what'll ya have? The Cave player says: "I'll have a....."

I'm really tempted to try to finish that, but I'd probably get flamed if I did, heh heh.

[U K Narayan]

This is totally not related to shoot-'em-ups, but I found it funny nevertheless.

Why do women wear make-up?

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Because they're ugly.

I know it's kind of harsh, and untrue in alot of cases, but I had a laugh.

[ROBOTRON]

*A long post with lots of sarcasm*

Cheers

Leeram

Question:

Are you familiar with a show called "Are you being served?"

Even though I reside in Detroit, MI USA, the show is a fav of mine.

Anyway, Capt. Peacock and several employees went to a fancy eatery and placed the following order: "Egg and chips 4 times and bring a kettle".

Afterwards the audience errupts with laughter.

Not being a Britt, What exactly is that, and what is the hidden joke there?

[TWITCHDOCTOR]

A Dictator (dick-tate) get it?

This joke doesn't work too well, considering TATE is pronounced "ta-tay".

In Japanese yes... but in regular English speech, it'd sound stupid (it makes more sense to sound it out in english phonetics). Also, TA-TE in Japanese is not "ta-tay", but more of a "ta-teh" (short punchy "teh", not an elongated "tay"). So try fitting that into conversation...

p.s. Yes, that first joke was really stupid... heh.

Yea, I know...it was early, and I tried. Sometimes I make up somthing pretty funny...while other times, well, I might just bomb.

[BulletMagnet]

Sometimes I make up somthing pretty funny...while other times, well, I might just bomb.

Pun intended?

[Leeram]

Are you being served is one of those TV shows where I either don't laugh at all, or laugh so hard it hurts my ribs. I don't find it consistently funny but the occasional joke has me in stitches.

I guess it depends on the context of the show, inherently it doesn't seem to mean anything. Without seeing the show I am guessing it is a joke about not having any money when you are in an expensive restaurant.

I guess the restaurant was French or some other high class place where they sell food with long names.

Egg and chips (the English kind of chip) is a basic food over here which many epople eat just as a quick cheap meal. It is the type of thing you would get from a very basic food outlet, normally called a cafe (this is different to a French cafe with an accent over the e), I don't know of an American equivelant. English cafe's are often scruffy and sell lots of greasy type cooked food such as egg, bacon, sausage etc but are cheap and most common people like them.

So to ask for egg and chips in a high class restaurant is, I guess, the joke. I think they are saying that they can't afford anything but the cheapest thing on the menu (if it is even on the menu).


The kettle part is because they are going to make their own cup of tea, rather than let the restaurant bring them one, because of the cost. A kettle in England is a thing you boil water in. I guess it's got the same name in the USA but I don't know. You don't have pavements or bins (well you do have bins but they are different) so hopefully you'll see that I'm not trying to patronise you here.

The whole joke seems to revolve around poor people who can't afford what's on the menu, so they order the most basic common food (whether it's on the menu or not, the restaurant is likely to be offended to cook it) but that will still be so expensive they can't afford to buy a cup of tea as well, so they ask for a kettle so they can make their own.

What's funny about it is you would expect Peacock et al to order an expensive meal but then they say that, which everyone in England will instantly understand as poor people out of their depth, and laugh.

It's hard to tell though without watching the show. Do you happen to know the episode name? I'm intrigued now!

Cheers

Leeram

[Andi]

Why do women wear make-up?
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Because they're ugly.

Beautiful joke.

[BulletMagnet]

It is the type of thing you would get from a very basic food outlet, normally called a cafe (this is different to a French cafe with an accent over the e), I don't know of an American equivelant. English cafe's are often scruffy and sell lots of greasy type cooked food such as egg, bacon, sausage etc but are cheap and most common people like them.

Hmm, about the closest American equivalent I can think of is maybe a "diner," or some such place...or, in slang, a "greasy spoon," heh heh.

[russ]

It is the type of thing you would get from a very basic food outlet, normally called a cafe (this is different to a French cafe with an accent over the e), I don't know of an American equivelant. English cafe's are often scruffy and sell lots of greasy type cooked food such as egg, bacon, sausage etc but are cheap and most common people like them.

Hmm, about the closest American equivalent I can think of is maybe a "diner," or some such place...or, in slang, a "greasy spoon," heh heh.

I dont think I've ever heard the term "greasy spoon", and I'd be damned if I eat at a place that is referred to as that

On an obscure but related side note, I just discovered that what us Americans call "potato chips" the English call "crisps" apparently. Yay for multiculturalism! (or maybe I'm just a little slow)

[EOJ]

A Dictator (dick-tate) get it?

This joke doesn't work too well, considering TATE is pronounced "ta-tay".

In Japanese yes... but in regular English speech, it'd sound stupid (it makes more sense to sound it out in english phonetics). Also, TA-TE in Japanese is not "ta-tay", but more of a "ta-teh" (short punchy "teh", not an elongated "tay"). So try fitting that into conversation...

p.s. Yes, that first joke was really stupid... heh.

I know how it is pronounced in Japanese, I'm a professional linguist and I speak Japanese. It is a Japanese word, not an English word. I wouldn't even consider it a loanword in English yet, because it is essentially regulated to Western players of vertical shooting games. In English we have a perfectly fine equivalent, which is "vertical". But perhaps when using "tate" in English we should write it with an accent over the final 'e' to indicate it is not silent, much like in French loanwords like "cliche". You pronounce the final 'e' there, right? It doesn't sound stupid and you don't say "Clich" do you. Same thing with "tate". And I know it's really "ta-te" but in English we don't have a short [e] (not even phonetically), it's always diphthongal as [ei], so I was trying to give the English speakers the closest approximation, which, in English orthography, could be written something like "ta-tay" or "tah-tay"(or simply "tate" with an accent over the final 'e').

Have a nice day.

[ROBOTRON]

It's hard to tell though without watching the show. Do you happen to know the episode name? I'm intrigued now!

Cheers

Leeram

Gotcha.

I'm not sure what the name of the episode was, but Ms Brahms had a date with a rich guy, he invited her to dinner at a fancy restarant and told her to bring friends, he would pay the bill. They were seated, and the guy walks in and immediately falls for another girl there and leaves her (Brahms) hanging. The waiter then approaches to take the order, Peacock says: "Egg and chips 4 times and bring a kettle".

I was like, what was the joke?

lol, its now funny, I see the joke.

Thanx again.

[neorichieb1971]

I once said "nappies" in America and got a weird look.

Its English for Diapers


I once said "Hoovering the carpet" in America and got a weird look.

Vacuuming the carpet.

[EOJ]

I once said "nappies" in America and got a weird look.

Its English for Diapers


I once said "Hoovering the carpet" in America and got a weird look.

Vacuuming the carpet.

Did you ever say "knock up" in America (which I've read means "rouse from sleeping by knocking" in England but "make pregnant" in America)? That one can get you into funny situations if used cross-dialectally.

[mrMagenta]

which, in English orthography, could be written something like "ta-tay" or "tah-tay"

i don't get the "y", i've taken some japanese and i'm sure it's not pronounced "ta' tei" (swedish (meta)orthography of tah-tay).. correct, the "e" is not cut out, but there also is nothing after the "e" if it is to be japanese pronounciation. i guess that's why people are commenting, not because they don't know what the word sounds like. we could be talking about the exact same thing, only some of us non-english persons get confused with the regional orthography

[BulletMagnet]

I think "tah-teh" is supposed to be the correct pronunciation, but I don't think I've ever even used the word out loud (I can only remember typing it, never actually saying it), so I honestly don't care that much, heh heh.

[Thunder Force]

Should be OT...

[EOJ]

which, in English orthography, could be written something like "ta-tay" or "tah-tay"

i don't get the "y", i've taken some japanese and i'm sure it's not pronounced "ta' tei" (swedish (meta)orthography of tah-tay).. correct, the "e" is not cut out, but there also is nothing after the "e" if it is to be japanese pronounciation. i guess that's why people are commenting, not because they don't know what the word sounds like. we could be talking about the exact same thing, only some of us non-english persons get confused with the regional orthography

The "y" following "a" is just a convention of English spelling for the diphthong [ei] in open syllables (i.e. syllables not closed by a consonant), as in "day", "say", "May", etc. There are other ways to represent it, like "ai" in "bait", and "aCe" (where C represents an obstruent consonant) as in "hate" or "ate". The Japanese pronunciation lacks the final segment and is a true short [e]. Again, the English language does not have this sound, all [e] sounds are automatically lengthened to [ei] (which, again, corresponds in English orthography to "-ay"). We do have a short, lax "e" as in "bet", but that is a different phoneme altogether and it cannot occur in open syllables either. So in English the closest approximation to the original Japanese pronunciation which is still within the rules and constraints of English phonetics and phonology would be [tatei] in the International Phonetics Alphabet (IPA).

Sorry if I've gotten too technical here, it's quite difficult to explain linguistic topics properly using non-linguistic terms.

[Specineff]

Chips are not what Americans call chips (a bit like football isn't what Americans call football). America might be bigger than Great Britain, but it is wrong all the same.

Thanks man. People would swear to me that soccer is NOT football (even though you use your FOOT to hit a BALL). You guys invented it, and sure have a right to call it football. Yes, American Football is Football all right. But soccer is too, you racist ESPN byotches!

Unrelated: One thing that really surprised me when coming down from working at a fancy store in Snotts-dale, Az, was two euro tourists getting absolutely confused when I told them a store was 3/4 of a mile away from the corner we were at. They thought it was some sort of local slang. Come on. It's not like the UK is on the other side of the world in relation to the rest of western Europe.

Of course I said "1 Km" and then they understood.