That bitch Lucas announces Star wars on Blu Rayz

[moozooh]

all the gals want to do is get fucked while they're being sucked

Damn, one good quote after another!

[Skykid]

It's a gothic/horror classic. But you won't find many grad (or even undergrad) classes with Dracula on the syllabus, like you would Frankenstein. One of my professors has an essay featured in the Norton edition. Even she doesn't really take it seriously except for its popularization of the vampire as a Victorian trope for sexuality. Of course, it had been done earlier and better by the likes of Goethe and Coleridge.

Don't get me wrong, it's very good. But it's pop-lit that's been elevated by its iconic status (much as you argued re: Pacino). As far as VicLit goes, it's kind of bottom-of-the-barrel.

So I won't shed any tears for unfaithful adaptations.

I completely disagree. I'm not sure who's convinced you that it's low-end victorian toilet titillation. One man's essay is another mans bullshit.
It's cheapened by its iconic status in the modern mainstream primarily due to its non-stop Hollywood bastardisation. The fact that it's never been done any justice is highly regrettable considering the depth of the material. It's a brilliantly written piece of work completely comparable to Frankenstein and deserved of its status as a literary classic (not just a gothic horror one, as I'd like to point out.)

We're not talking about an average novel by any stretch, just another shit interpretation of it.

"Ahhhh....talk about Star Wars!"

Sorry.

[greg]

By the way, if you haven't done it already, do yourself a favor and watch Red Letter Media's reviews of episodes I and II. Not only are they hilarious, but they also show exactly why the prequels suck.

http://www.redlettermedia.com/phantom_menace.html
http://www.redlettermedia.com/clones.html

They're long, but by the end you'll wish they were even longer.

There's a third one out now. 100 minutes long: http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star ... -the-sith/

I watched all of these prequel reviews yesterday since I was "working" from home. As hilarious as they were, they were so very spot-on accurate. The "psycho kidnapping women in his basement" motif of the reviews were a funny gag at first, but then it got tiring and eventually when he went on this tangent, I wish he'd just go back to commenting on Star Wars (the part about mailing pizza rolls to people was funny, though).

These reviews reminded me of sooooooooo many objections I felt while watching the prequels in the movie theater for the first time. I knew that midichlorians totally ruined the the concept of The Force, but the way he articulated this was perfect. Putting a lightsaber in the hands of Yoda totally ruined his character, since we always felt he was above and beyond that sort of thing. I saw Episode II in Japan, and went to see it twice. Each time, the audience laughed when Yoda was jumping around like a frog. I thought it was funny and laughed the first time, too.

Lucas's scapegoat is that Star Wars are just "kids movies," but by repeating that, he's really forced a dichotomy onto his two movies. On one hand, you see little boy Anakin and Jar Jar acting silly, and on the other you have long, drawn-out political conversations, dismemberments, and children getting slaughtered. Superimposing these scenes onto the TV set in the picture of two small children in a photograph hilariously illustrated this absurdity.

Not only that, but he points out stuff I'd never thought of before. Much of the character development is when the characters are slowly walking around, or sitting around on couches. He takes footage of the "making of" and shows how Lucas is a lazy bastard sitting behind computer screens, switching between camera 1 and camera 2, guzzling coffee and calling that "directing." "Oh Hayden, so when you read this line, stand up and look out of the window. Pretend there's a window here." GEE THANKS, LUCAS.

So the review for the first movie was about 70 minutes long. The review of the second was about an hour and a half, and the third is nearly two hours long. With a review like this, I was expecting that some of the criticisms would've been fetching quite a bit, as with that article on 30 reasons why ROTJ sucks" that was linked earlier. I only felt that way maybe once or twice during all of these reviews. The reviews were very intelligent and showed exactly why they were bad movies, from the camera angles to how the sets and events totally ape the original movies. It's as if Lucas was telling himself, "Hey, I don't need Kurtz or Kasdan. All I need to do is recycle stuff from the original trilogy and the fans will endear to these new movies as well.

He should've mentioned how Spielberg was publicly offering to direct Revenge of the Sith for Lucas. He apparently knew his friend had gone mad, and was trying to salvage ROTS. He apparently respected Star Wars fans more than Lucas did.

Oh yeah, and over the weekend I watched the prequel trilogy with the Rifftrax.com commentary. So completely hilarious. They've done commentary for the original trilogy, but they don't outright BASH the movies like they do to the prequels. Chad Vader helps out, too.

[CMoon]

By the way, if you haven't done it already, do yourself a favor and watch Red Letter Media's reviews of episodes I and II. Not only are they hilarious, but they also show exactly why the prequels suck.

http://www.redlettermedia.com/phantom_menace.html
http://www.redlettermedia.com/clones.html

They're long, but by the end you'll wish they were even longer.

There's a third one out now. 100 minutes long: http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star ... -the-sith/

I watched all of these prequel reviews yesterday since I was "working" from home. As hilarious as they were, they were so very spot-on accurate.

Yup, they're both brilliant and hilarious. I absent-mindedly clicked on those links and found myself wanting to watch them again. There are points he's just having fun saying shit like 'marty mcfly' in that dumb voice of his. Awesome. But yeah, spot-on at the same time.

Really, the prequel movies aren't just bad star wars movies. They are bad movies.

[spl]

Wow I didn't realise people wern't a fan of ROTJ! It's my favourite one by far. People prefer Empire Strikes back??

#1 - ROTJ
#2 - SW
#3 - ESB

Never seen the prequels.

[Skykid]

Wow I didn't realise people wern't a fan of ROTJ! It's my favourite one by far. People prefer Empire Strikes back??

#1 - ROTJ
#2 - SW
#3 - ESB

Never seen the prequels.

Keep it that way.

For the record, your taste is highly questionable but your heart is in the right place so it's all good.

[Drum]

Wow I didn't realise people wern't a fan of ROTJ! It's my favourite one by far. People prefer Empire Strikes back??

#1 - ROTJ
#2 - SW
#3 - ESB

Never seen the prequels.

RotJ is widely - and correctly - regarded as being the worst of the best Star Wars movies, with Empire generally considered the best.

[Skykid]

By the way, if you haven't done it already, do yourself a favor and watch Red Letter Media's reviews of episodes I and II. Not only are they hilarious, but they also show exactly why the prequels suck.

http://www.redlettermedia.com/phantom_menace.html
http://www.redlettermedia.com/clones.html

They're long, but by the end you'll wish they were even longer.

There's a third one out now. 100 minutes long: http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star ... -the-sith/

I stumbled on the Phantom Menace review ages ago and loved it. Just watched Episode II through. The guy is really brilliant. Not only is it exceptionally well composed as a film, but his critiquing never fails to amaze. Even though I know the film is total trash, there were so many horrific errors of logic and glaring contradictions I didn't ever recognise, and the rip offs from other sources were a real eye opener.

Most important is how succinctly he identifies why the imagery fails to stir any emotion, and breaks it down in detail as opposed to just saying "cg sucks because."

Really up for the third one now.

[GaijinPunch]

RotJ is widely - and correctly - regarded as being the worst of the best Star Wars movies, with Empire generally considered the best.

The biggest issue in the history of being a Star Wars fan is that Randal's character in Clerks liked Jedi over Empire, basically b/c he found the social ramifications of blowing up the 2nd Death Star unsettling b/c it no doubt had private contractors working on it, who didn't give a shit about politics.

[Moniker]

C3PO also flagrantly defied the prime directive in his dealings with the Ewoks. I mean c'mon...

[BulletMagnet]

The biggest issue in the history of being a Star Wars fan is that Randal's character in Clerks liked Jedi over Empire, basically b/c he found the social ramifications of blowing up the 2nd Death Star unsettling b/c it no doubt had private contractors working on it, who didn't give a shit about politics.

*insert Halliburton joke here*

[Udderdude]

RotJ is widely - and correctly - regarded as being the worst of the best Star Wars movies, with Empire generally considered the best.

The biggest issue in the history of being a Star Wars fan is that Randal's character in Clerks liked Jedi over Empire, basically b/c he found the social ramifications of blowing up the 2nd Death Star unsettling b/c it no doubt had private contractors working on it, who didn't give a shit about politics.

How about that Anakin is back to being a "good guy light side ghost" after saving his son in Jedi, despite having destroyed an entire planet and civilization with billions of people in the first film?

I guess all those billions of people just all decided it was alright, he was forgiven and didn't have to go to the force equivalent of dark side afterlife hell, or something. Or maybe billions of vengeful ghosts drag him down immediately after the credits roll. :p

[Skykid]

Just finished part 3 of the redletter reviews.

Beautiful work. It's rare I find anyone who I agree with 100% when it comes to film argument, but this guy nails every last failing with finesse and accuracy.
I particularly like the editing chapter, so revealing.

What a sad shame the prequels are.

[CMoon]

The biggest problem with those reviews is that it almost makes you want to watch the prequels. I mean, memory is failing over time, but as far as those movies, I think that's a good thing.

Seriously, if they weren't SW films, no one would care. What's worse, if they weren't SW films, they'd have never have made enough money to justify more than one.

[NTSC-J]

Just finished part 3 of the redletter reviews.

Beautiful work. It's rare I find anyone who I agree with 100% when it comes to film argument, but this guy nails every last failing with finesse and accuracy.
I particularly like the editing chapter, so revealing.

What a sad shame the prequels are.

I've seen the Plinkett reviews about 10 times apiece (probably more for the first one). They're surprisingly therapeutic for the jaded Star Wars fan and I never get tired of them. Favorite scenes of mine are the ones about the crappy characters in TPM and the awful way they film dialogue scenes in RotS.

And I haven't even seen the second and third ones! Although it almost feels like I have with these reviews...

[Obiwanshinobi]

I think Dracula has some charm to it because it utilises very theatrical lighting techniques - not so much as One From the Heart, but it's certainly there. Yes it's filmed in a studio, with miniatures, forced perspective, reverse photography... it's like a mini Mario Bava film. Lots of lighting transitions done on set that would now be handled in post production.

Meh. There's a number of highly stylised ("neoexpressionist" if you like), purely atelier films made around that time and looking so much better than Dracula it's not even funny: Brazil, Delicatessen, Hardware, The City of Lost Childern, 12 Monkeys, Alien Resurrection...
I found even Dick Tracy more visually accomplished than Dracula (and I don't think much of the former). In terms production values the latter totally is down there with Battlefield Earth and Total Recall.

[Skykid]

The biggest problem with those reviews is that it almost makes you want to watch the prequels.

Not for me, it left me totally cold for them. If I ever watch them again it will be to see what the fan edits are like, but even then it's just an attempt to make shit films more watchable by cutting them to shreds. Ultimately you're still watching a shredded shit film.

Fucking Lucas.

[burgerkingdiamond]

I'm not a hardcore Star Wars fan. I do remember seeing the prequels when they came out and thinking they sucked, but I had nowhere near enough knowledge about the SW universe to really put it into words besides just the obvious "this is boring CGI crap".

I am SO happy to have found those Plinkett reviews. They are entertaining as hell and really point out in detail what makes them suck so much compared to the originals. It makes me want to rewatch them so I can fully appreciate their awfulness.

[burgerkingdiamond]

Wouldn't it be fun to strap Lucas down, tape his eyelids open and force him to watch all of these Plinkett reviews?

[greg]

Wouldn't it be fun to strap Lucas down, tape his eyelids open and force him to watch all of these Plinkett reviews?

That would be a good idea. I'd settle for at least having him being forced to watch The People vs George Lucas though. I've preordered that movie and I look forward to seeing it. The preorder price on Amazon is a good deal.

[dan76]

Seriously, if they weren't SW films, no one would care. What's worse, if they weren't SW films, they'd have never have made enough money to justify more than one.

They're not Star Wars films in my book. They have virtually nothing in common with the original films, in spirit or production.

It's a series of films that use names from the old trilogy to tell a poor story. Seriously, the Holiday Special is more Star Wars than the prequels.

[Udderdude]

Wouldn't it be fun to strap Lucas down, tape his eyelids open and force him to watch all of these Plinkett reviews?

Clockwork Orange scene with Lucas? Do want.

[Skykid]

That would be a good idea. I'd settle for at least having him being forced to watch The People vs George Lucas though. I've preordered that movie and I look forward to seeing it.

It's okay but not damning enough by the end. It lightheartedly lobbies against his prequels and is a fun watch, but it's too soft on his frankly inexcusable decisions.

I'd force him to watch the Plinkett reviews over and over until I know he got it.

[PC Engine Fan X!]

RotJ is widely - and correctly - regarded as being the worst of the best Star Wars movies, with Empire generally considered the best.

The biggest issue in the history of being a Star Wars fan is that Randal's character in Clerks liked Jedi over Empire, basically b/c he found the social ramifications of blowing up the 2nd Death Star unsettling b/c it no doubt had private contractors working on it, who didn't give a shit about politics.

How about that Anakin is back to being a "good guy light side ghost" after saving his son in Jedi, despite having destroyed an entire planet and civilization with billions of people in the first film?

I guess all those billions of people just all decided it was alright, he was forgiven and didn't have to go to the force equivalent of dark side afterlife hell, or something. Or maybe billions of vengeful ghosts drag him down immediately after the credits roll. :p

Like in the ending scene in Ghost with the guy's soul being pursued by dark wraiths, right?

If Anakin didn't pursue the Dark Side of the Force, he would've become the youngest Jedi that the Old Republic had ever seen -- not to mention to see both of his two kids born and spend time with his beloved wife. Would've been a different story indeed.

PC Engine Fan X! ^_~

[Drum]

RotJ is widely - and correctly - regarded as being the worst of the best Star Wars movies, with Empire generally considered the best.

The biggest issue in the history of being a Star Wars fan is that Randal's character in Clerks liked Jedi over Empire, basically b/c he found the social ramifications of blowing up the 2nd Death Star unsettling b/c it no doubt had private contractors working on it, who didn't give a shit about politics.

What keeps George Lucas from commiting suicide: 'At least I'm not Kevin Smith'.

How about that Anakin is back to being a "good guy light side ghost" after saving his son in Jedi, despite having destroyed an entire planet and civilization with billions of people in the first film?

I really hate how quick he is to pat himself on the back about that after tossing the Emperor. Humility not a Sith's strong point.

[Moniker]

Because god knows we need more posts in this thread.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=38k-qfy5 ... e=youtu.be

And no, I was not linked to this from a free porn site. Fuck you.

[GaijinPunch]

What keeps George Lucas from commiting suicide: 'At least I'm not Kevin Smith'.

He'd be bored to death by not having 90% of his fan base bashing him if he was.

[greg]

Right on! The Red Letter Media guy who trashed the prequels actually sticks up for the Star Trek reboot movie. I happen to like that movie a lot, so I was wary of him trashing it like he did the prequels. He actually gives it a good review.
http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star ... r-trek-09/

[Sly Cherry Chunks]

^Yeah! He also correctly lists The Motion Picture as his favourite. (in one of his reviews somewhere)

[greg]

I loved the first Star Trek movie. The only thing I didn't like were the weird uniforms. The overall design wasn't too bad, but there was no consistency with them at all. Were these Starfleet uniforms? You can just wear short sleeves anytime you want to? There was no rhyme or reason to the uniforms at all.