CHARMLESS CRAPPED BLAST
TRASHSTORM IS NOT A REAL STORY.
IS NOT EVEN GOOD FICTION.
IS TRASH GAME REVIEWS.
ALL OF THE GAMES FEATURED WOULD CAUSE A PERSON DISAPPOINTMENT,
ANGER, FRUSTRATION, DEPRESSION, MONEY LOSS INCLUDED.
TO PUT IT ANOTHER WAY: DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME.
Oh my... More of those "99 Cents" shmups. This time is Pixicharm - Starry Blast by Erdem Sen and Everynot Game Studio.
No one wants to be responsible for this.
Here's the title screen, no "(C) Everynot Game Studio or something", its like they don't want to get involved in this game. The main menu is just pick an icon because they apparently are either stupid or lazy enough to say "START GAME" "MUSIC ON/OFF" "SOUND ON/OFF" and "VIBRATION ON/OFF".
Bland and Generic, your basic 1 dollar crap.
The gameplay of Pixicharm - Starry Blast is your common "zero effort" shmup where the difficulty is in the "we don't care" level. Where the shmup basically gives up on you. ¿Why? Your ship has a great firing rate, which might be good for bullet hells, but its more that the required for a basic shmup where do you expect some challenge... any other shmup except this game, because the enemy doesn't make an effort on trying to stop you. They appear in very small numbers and they go down in one hit, and to make things even more pathetic, there's no bosses to fight in this game. Basically, there's no way to lose, you will always take all of them down, but ironically, there's no way to win either because it doesn't end.
There's two items in the game: Coins that do nothing but give you points and Spare Ships (1ups). Yeah, what's the point of having coins if you can't buy jack shit in the game? There's no store or power ups to purchase in-between levels, oh, I forgot. There's no stages, just a never-ending level that just goes on and on. Since the enemy gives a fuck about fighting you, the only way to die is by deliberately crashing your ship and avoiding the Spare Ships because playing this game is like putting your hands on the fucking stove already, but picking a Spare Ship is like deciding to keep the hands on the fire: You're numb by the pain, but you're doing yourself a lot of permanent damage. Now, I've never played with a Ouija board, but if I had I'm sure it would told me about how I would be spending the rest of my life: Playing fecal grade shooters and warning everyone about them, wishing I'd rather talk about anime styled girls wearing bikinis, sipping an umbrella drink on the beach watching the sunset. Yeah, I know, throwing that old fanservice punchline of mine that I've mentioned on my review of Solar Shifter EX. But it's better that than posting "Calamity. That's what this is" I guess.
Well done! You've got all the trophies.
Cheap shit.
Fortunately, the game lasts two minutes since that's all what you need to obtain the trophies and the Platinum. Seriously, this shit again? What does they think playing a shmup it is? A bag of gummy bears? Fuck that. If I'm paying for a game (I don't care about the price) I expect a good shooter, or at least a decent product.
Graphically, it's a different story from the crappy gameplay. I've got to admit the game developers made a considerable effort on the graphics at the point of looking appropiate for a portable console such as the WonderSwan color and the Sega Game Gear because they are more detailed than your average NES game and the color changing space looks good, but you can clearly notice it is a vertical column repeating forever rather than semi-random patterns like the commercial games of the era. In terms of sprite art, they're nicely animated to look somewhat professional. The bullets are colorful rather than the classic dot seen in old shmups and retro-styled games and your ship has yawing animation when moving. Only the score font is the giveaway that shouts "Indie shmup" because it looks more like a demo of a larger game. So, the developer has the idea, but it needs more work to complete it.
Well, the music is another point in favor since it sounds like the NES Konami games in the percussion (Think LifeForce, Contra Force, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III: The Manhattan Project), which is great for a low budget game. Too bad that the Main Menu song is the only thing you'll hear in the entire game because they only composed one track for this fucking thing.
Right now, pulling the plug is the smartest decision.
Pixicharm - Starry Blast is another title of the "Only for a buck" league of shmups that does nothing to bring something new or at least challenging for the player, just buy get the trophies, uninstall and forget about the game never to mention it again.
Anyway, this backs up one thought that I have when I review shitty shmups: It's not the budget, is the time spent in development.
So, Pixicharm - Starry Blast is a lesser offender that earns 3/10 R-9's in the R-Scale due to its NES styled music:
Eda's still not convinced with this game.