Nintendo's Secret QOL Device 'Alarmo' Is an Alarm Clock

[Sengoku Strider]

ALARMO! Only $99.99 USD/$129.99 CAD



It's not a Switch app or anything, it's a physical clock that blares Nintendo music and uses a motion sensor to pelt you mercilessly with Splatoon sound effects:

Nintendo Sound Clock: Alarmo – Announcement Trailer

Maybe you could withstand this every morning, but it would break me. Even the ad video makes it look like torture. Vita's Wake Up Club (hardest platinum trophy in history!) is still the reigning king.

[BareKnuckleRoo]

How utterly embarrassing. It's a blatant cash grab.

We all carry devices with alarm clock functions nowadays and if you want a dedicated bedside alarm clock it'd cost you 1/4 of the price. This is an expensive, and relatively useless adult toy.

[To Far Away Times]

“Wake up Babe, new Nintendo hardware just dropped.”

[Sengoku Strider]

How utterly embarrassing. It's a blatant cash grab.

We all carry devices with alarm clock functions nowadays and if you want a dedicated bedside alarm clock it'd cost you 1/4 of the price. This is an expensive, and relatively useless adult toy.

Y'know, it's priced like something aimed at adults, but it looks like it's all kids/teenagers in the video. Nintendo must be feeling invincible right now.

[BareKnuckleRoo]

That or they're really, really desperate for an influx of cash to fund the Switch 2's development and cranked out something cheap with a huge profit margin.

[XoPachi]

I can just imagine vividly the sort of person that would buy this and I'm dreading their YouTube thumbnails I'm going to inevitably see.

>Switch Online required
LMAO

[Lander]

It responds to the movement of your body with game sounds!

...WHY?

[Sima Tuna]

I would pay money to not be pelted with annoying sound effects by my electronic devices, and you're telling me I can have this for free by simply not purchasing an overpriced scam? Sweet!

Spoiler

I'm the kind of person who keeps their phone perpetually on silent/vibrate and usually turned off when I'm not using it.

[Sengoku Strider]

>Switch Online required
LMAO

I don't have a problem with that part, it's their means of preventing scalpers. Initially it's only sold on their online store and the NY Nintendo store, through Christmas. It's going out to normal retailers in January, I'd guess they drop the requirement then.

Would people scalp this? I dunno, they opened that Nintendo museum in Kyoto and resellers were scalping the whole gift shop, so yeah, probably.

[Sumez]

I see this and raise you an Andrew Garfield kitchen timer just revealed from A24:

https://shop.a24films.com/products/andr ... chen-timer

[sunnshiner]

[Sengoku Strider]

Nintendo suspends sales for the Alarmo clock in Japan due to high demand

The £89.99 / €99.99 alarm clock was selling out, so Nintendo will organize a lottery.

Colour me baffled.

[TransatlanticFoe]

This is an expensive, and relatively useless adult toy.

Agreed, this does strike me as poor design for an adult toy

[BrianC]

Dang Nintendo, you can't make a modern Game & Watch with an alarm and now you make an expensive clock with an alarm that can't play games?

[BareKnuckleRoo]

Agreed, this does strike me as poor design for an adult toy

Won't stop someone dedicated who's willing to stretch, though.

[Mortificator]

It responds to the movement of your body with game sounds!

...WHY?

Gettin busy while the Alarmo goes Yah! Wah! Woohoo!!

[Lander]

Nintendo suspends sales for the Alarmo clock in Japan due to high demand

The £89.99 / €99.99 alarm clock was selling out, so Nintendo will organize a lottery.

Colour me baffled.

And we're sure this isn't some sort of elaborate Concord-esque tax scam?

Gettin busy while the Alarmo goes Yah! Wah! Woohoo!!

Then I hope it's precise enough to play *1UP Jingle* when appropriate!

[Daytime Waitress]

>Switch Online required
LMAO

I don't have a problem with that part, it's their means of preventing scalpers.

>create artificial scarcity
>remember that capitalism functions exactly the way it does
>save face by reassuring all the plebs who were butthurt about being too slow on the button to partake in artifical scarcity by implementing a feature no human being would ever require

Wow, you're right - it goes from "stupid" to "fukken gross" pretty quick!

*horrific parodies of commemerative tat that were only marginally less sick-inducing than the actual products of such companies wait no*

"Hook-a-Duck stall quality" is absolutely gonna be my go-to insult for the forseeable future.

It responds to the movement of your body with game sounds!

...WHY?

Gettin busy while the Alarmo goes Yah! Wah! Woohoo!!

A double somersault on every third thrust?
At my age?
Not happening, pet.

[Sengoku Strider]

>create artificial scarcity
>remember that capitalism functions exactly the way it does
>save face by reassuring all the plebs who were butthurt about being too slow on the button to partake in artifical scarcity by implementing a feature no human being would ever require

Wow, you're right - it goes from "stupid" to "fukken gross" pretty quick!

Enh, I wouldn't be that harsh here, considering they've publicly said that building up supply to address demand and dissuade scalping is the reason Switch 2 got pushed back. This goofy expensive alarm clock is hardly the type of slam-dunk product you know you can go huge on out the gate. It's pretty clearly a constructive move to ensure their fans are first in line - Sony made literally the exact same move with PS5 Pro, requiring a PSN account to preorder. Everybody hates scalpers, and they're going to be there with their bot networks no matter what unless you're oversupplying the market, which is just hard to do on the first manufacturing run.

[Steven]

This thing has a day 1 patch.

Vita's Wake Up Club (hardest platinum trophy in history!) is still the reigning king.

Wake Up Club is still my alarm, and my battered launch Vita from December 2011 remains on my bed as my clock and alarm clock to this day. At this point, my Vita is one of the most used things I have ever owned.

[BryanM]

... any of you forget about the time Nintendo sold people cardboard, literal cardboard??

(I always do.)

It reminds me of 'Disney adults', they'll find a buyer for any product they make.

Still feel ripped off we never got that KFConsole. I really needed a place to store my fried chicken that was 2 inches away from some computer chips.

This kind of thing is still positively fine compared to the milking Hasbro has been doing with Magic the Gathering. Reprinting old sets with all the colors taken away. Asking thousands of dollars for proxies of the first set (with a few cards removed), versus the original $40 or $80 the original version of that product cost back in the past.

Nintendo would have to start selling fake NES cartridges of the original Mario Bros for $100,000+ to top that.

[ExitPlanetDust]

considering they've publicly said that building up supply to address demand and dissuade scalping is the reason Switch 2 got pushed back.