Ninja Gaiden [NES] + R2RKMF: Scrolling Action Monogatari

[FinalBaton]

Yeah I discovered last month that Ys 1 had a dos port. Pretty cool!

Too bad it's garbage. Even the music is butchered.

Oh. Well, that sucks

[BrianC]

Ugh. Ys port was by Unlimited Software who also did terrible computer ports of Castlevania and the NES TMNT.

[BIL]

Sounds like the PC equivalent of Micronics. That is, a bunch of gold-digging license whores I'd gladly send a T-800 to retroactively murder to the last man.

[FinalBaton]

On the UK micros and 16 bit computer front (I'm not too knowledgeable on that part of gaming history, but I'm tring to learn), wasn't U.S. Gold also a fucking chode when it comes to this? Shitty ports of japanese arcade games and of Sega and Nintendo console games and stuff? Like not all of their output, but at least a good portion of their early releases? I think they eventually acquired some good smaller studios at some point though

[Jonny2x4]

U.S. Gold never really programmed any of their games. They contracted developers to do their work for them. IIRC, Tiertex were the ones who made most of their shitty ports.

[WelshMegalodon]

Oh, and how.

Strider
Rolling Thunder
Final Fight
OutRun

[FinalBaton]

U.S. Gold never really programmed any of their games. They contracted developers to do their work for them. IIRC, Tiertex were the ones who made most of their shitty ports.

I know but those games are still under their name. They're the ones who look bad

[TransatlanticFoe]

Tiertex did the 8 bit Sega versions of Star Wars so they're not all bad. Okay so it was just the conversion of the NES game but still, they didn't screw it up!

Also SMS Strider II but no-one else seems to like that one.

[Marc]

Tiertex weren't all bad, their Speccy ports at least usually turned out relatively enjoyable for the time. I passed many an hour with their interpretations of Street Fighter, Rolling Thunder and 720. C64 versions usually blew though. Don't remember them being responsible for OutRun - sure (on the C64 at least) that was 'Amazing Creations' or something similar.

[Sumez]

Got around to finally slapping another disk into the FDS yesterday, that has been lying around for too many years:

Nazo No Murasamejou!



Far from the Zelda-like I had expected, this is pure linear, fast paced hardcore ninja-action! See those ninja kids? They don't patrol along the X and Y axis, they home straight for your sorry ass, and aren't afraid to toss a bunch of shurikens in your direction either.
The controls are tight, the hitboxes are super lenient, and switching between kunais at a distance and the sword for devastating melee attacks or quick defensive maneuvers works flawlessly. My only issue right now is that it's very easy to get complacent with the forgiving hitbox, and end up taking a hit due to being a little too optimistic about what I can hit. These ninjas are fast as fuck.

Only two castles into the game, it is already super hard, this is definitely from the most uncompromising year of Nintendo's history! Though I imagine knowledge of the stage layouts, all the hidden secrets (of which are seemingly hundreds!), and the ability to keep hold of your weapon upgrades, Contra-style, will help mellow down the game if I would ever put the effort into learning it.

[BIL]

Aww yes, Murasame is killer. Distills and expands Zelda 1's arcadey seek/destroy aspect into total castle-raiding carnage. There's a reason it's my YT channel banner.



Right from the title screen you know shit is gonna go down!

[Jonny2x4]

Tiertex weren't all bad, their Speccy ports at least usually turned out relatively enjoyable for the time. I passed many an hour with their interpretations of Street Fighter, Rolling Thunder and 720. C64 versions usually blew though. Don't remember them being responsible for OutRun - sure (on the C64 at least) that was 'Amazing Creations' or something similar.

Final Fight on Amiga and Atari ST has no excuse for being as bad as they were though. Apparently the developer in charge of the port hated the arcade original, so that explains their quality.

[BIL]

I seem to recall hearing that - didn't he write some obnoxious tirade in the code, or something? That must really add to the port's formidable quality.

EDIT: haha, yeah, that was the one. Look at all this crap he wrote. Nobody wants to know about your favourite bands if the port sucks, pal! Do your job then fuck off. Be a man, not a whiny little bitch. Eh. Only 21 or so at the time, explains a lot.

[__SKYe]

Nobody wants to know about your favourite bands if the port sucks, pal! Do your job then fuck off. Be a man, not a whiny little bitch. Image

Amen. The rant would be infinitely cooler, if he had actually done a good job on the port.

[BIL]

"This port sucks, but with a programmer who is HALF AUSTRALIAN and LIKES SGT PEPPERS, gamers are assured great value for money." - actual box quote I just wrote.

[__SKYe]

My favourite parts were these two:

(21st May) Some b**tard came up behind me
when I was coming home from a club last night and hit me over the head
bloody hard with something - I don't know what, I was do busy being knocked
unconcious. I woke up in the gutter some time later, in a pool of blood (mine)
with some nice police lady calling me an ambulance (I don't know why, my name
is Richard, after all - ho ho ho). After about 6 stiches in my head courtesy of
the Bristol Royal Infirmary (and a tetanus jab), all I have to show for my
night of fun is a small bald patch with blue stiches in on the back of my
head, and the most amazingly coloured bruises you have ever seen. Who
says you can't have fun in Bristol any more? Anyway, thanks to the nice
police woman and the staff of the B.R.I. in casualty that
night, and no bloody thanks at all to whoever hit me!

Oh yeah - Hi to all the plebs who crowd into the Virgin Games Centre in
Bristol every Saturday morning and consistently refuse to recognise me
or Tim, even when we talk loudly about all the games we have written!!!!
- hellos also to the regulars at the White Hart (& Jill the rather nice
barmaid) and Sportsman pubs in Bristol!

[BIL]

Yeah I zeroed in on the apparent GBH too. Maybe he was compensating for the lack of high-impact street violence in the port itself.

Oh, here's my contribution to the atrocity exhibition, DOS Ninja Gaiden II. I don't even know where this thing came from. But I DO know it's everything I want from a mid-90s DOS port of a JP action thoroughbred. I hear the programmer is QUARTER IRISH and is MAD FOR THE 90S RAVE SOUND! His favourite artists include JAZZ MASTER JEFF and ROLLING STONE

[drauch]

Ah, but you can save your progress! A fine DOS version, indeed!

Oh, the lil' ogre guys' face as he hobbles along! I'm dyingggg.

[BIL]

Ah, but you can save your progress! A fine DOS version, indeed!

True. PC Master Race crushes console untermenschen once again.

[__SKYe]

Oh, here's my contribution to the atrocity exhibition, DOS Ninja Gaiden II. I don't even know where this thing came from. But I DO know it's everything I want from a mid-90s DOS port of a JP action thoroughbred. I hear the programmer is QUARTER IRISH and is MAD FOR THE 90S RAVE SOUND! His favourite artists include JAZZ MASTER JEFF and ROLLING STONE

MegaMan DOS is also pretty damn terrible. Man, these type of ports for DOS back in they day were so terrible, that I nearly weep just thinking of any poor sap getting any of them by mistake, just like the guy in that video.

Also, the ninja clones/shadows in that NG2 DOS look more like the actualy main character than the main sprite does.

[Herr Schatten]

Nazo No Murasamejou!

That one has been on my radar for a while now.

I was even tempted a few times to purchase the virtual console release for my 3DS. What has kept me from doing just that is that I'm unsure it won't end in a debacle similar to Recca. I was overjoyed to find Recca in the VC store, bought it, and immediately found out that, as nice as the game itself is, it's practically unplayable with the 3DS's clicky d-pad.

[BIL]

The GBA Famicom mini version is excellent and cheap (last I checked, shudder), if that's an option. As with all of those releases, the resolution is a tad smooshed but it plays great otherwise. I'm sure they don't move or handle quite as crisply as the 4:3 originals, but after 1-lifing Akumajou Dracula FC/GBA back to back as a test case, they're near enough for me.

[drauch]

Okay dudes, I wanna see one of you hardcore mofos clear some of these DOS versions now.

[BIL]

MegaMan DOS is also pretty damn terrible. Man, these type of ports for DOS back in they day were so terrible, that I nearly weep just thinking of any poor sap getting any of them by mistake, just like the guy in that video.

As a kid I had DOS Mega Man while my friend had NES MM1-3. I cried a lot.

I wonder if an absolute 1:1 conversion was even possible? Not knocking DOS or the PCs of the day, I just can't imagine this going down:



I'm biased though, having done the vast majority of my 2D action gaming on consoles. The smoothest-playing PC sidescroller I can recall is Commander Keen. I think Jazz Jackrabbit is supposed to be quite good? Going on second-hand reports there, though.

[Sumez]

Wow, that Final Fight Amiga thing is amazing. This sums up the early 90's Amiga scene absolutely perfectly!

Nazo No Murasamejou!

That one has been on my radar for a while now.

I was even tempted a few times to purchase the virtual console release for my 3DS. What has kept me from doing just that is that I'm unsure it won't end in a debacle similar to Recca. I was overjoyed to find Recca in the VC store, bought it, and immediately found out that, as nice as the game itself is, it's practically unplayable with the 3DS's clicky d-pad.

I can't imagine it being an issue, as Murasamejou only has 4-way movements similar to Zelda 1. I didn't even realise it was released on western 3DS VC until today! Either way, the FDS version is really cheap... but you'll need an FDS, of course.

[BIL]

Okay dudes, I wanna see one of you hardcore mofos clear some of these DOS versions now.

New announcement: Task Force Supreme Rank MASTER OF THE CHOPPENING is now up for grabs

CAN YOU STAND THE PAIN

Not lying, those PC ports depress me. When they're not making me burst out laughing.

[drauch]

I'm biased though, having done the vast majority of my 2D action gaming on consoles. The smoothest-playing PC sidescroller I can recall is Commander Keen. I think Jazz Jackrabbit is supposed to be quite good? Going on second-hand reports there, though.

Jazz plays well and runs quite smoothly, especially the second game, but they're still pretty basic platformers where you're just collecting gems and fruit and what-not. Entertaining, but not much of a challenge.

You may like the appropriately titled ABUSE. Basically playing as Predator with full mouse control on aiming. Fast-scrolling action!

[BIL]

Oh shit, I completely forgot about Abuse! I actually have that one back home, box and all. Like a dumbass I never got around to playing it, because I was going balls-out for Quake et al... shameful. I'd be all over it now.

Also, KNEEL BEFORE THE HORROR



Looks like a sock puppet

[Sumez]

What game is that? :O

[__SKYe]

As a kid I had DOS Mega Man while my friend had NES MM1-3. I cried a lot.

Haha, that must have been tough.

I wonder if an absolute 1:1 conversion was even possible? Not knocking DOS or the PCs of the day, I just can't imagine this going down:

Don't know about a 1:1 conversion, but devs could certainly do much better than what most released back then. Commander Keen is a perfect example of DOS platforming action done right (especially the later games), as was Jazz Jackrabbit, so it was certainly possible to do better. Some concessions would probably have to be made, on video and audio perhaps, but there's no excuse for crappy gameplay mechanics.
Some of those ports (if you can call them that) also suffer from too liberal of an interpretation, like the MegaMan one(s), especially when it comes to level design, which almost never turns out better than the original console games.

Although a few years later (1995), Turrican 2 DOS is a pretty cool game, though more into the 32-bit PSX/Saturn era.

Okay dudes, I wanna see one of you hardcore mofos clear some of these DOS versions now.

Not lying, those PC ports depress me. When they're not making me burst out laughing. Image

It's all good when watching someone else suffering through them, but playing them is a very different thing.
There's a difference between hardcore and masochism.

Jazz plays well and runs quite smoothly, especially the second game, but they're still pretty basic platformers where you're just collecting gems and fruit and what-not. Entertaining, but not much of a challenge.

You may like the appropriately titled ABUSE. Basically playing as Predator with full mouse control on aiming. Fast-scrolling action!

Yeah, but the collectathon gameplay is more of a design thing -- there's no denying that the graphical/audio/gameplay quality is there, and they could very well go with a more action oriented gameplay. Same with the Keen games, for that matter.

What game is that? :O

Ninja Gaiden II DOS.