i just peed on my roof

[nash87]

i saw the fat ninja across the street yesterday, looked a bit fatter. i wanted to scare it off, but had nothing to throw at it. my friend who threw the banana looked said "pee on it!" no fucking way that was going to happen. but the thought of the police report if i got doing such an act

"elderly lady reports seeing a male, late teen to mid 20's, running across the street holding out his penis. after reaching the other side of the street, began peeing on a raccoon. suspect then drove off. witness does not recall the make, or model of the car from being in shock of what she had just seen. the raccoon was later captured, given a proper shower, and relocated. suspect still at large"

heh, shower. i would be proud of such a police report.

but, if does ever come in the yard past the fence...should I?

[nash87]

no one's gonna touch that one huh? lol

[Specineff]

It conjures up many disturbing images, you know?

Or worse yet: "Man attempts to scare raccoon by peeing. Gets horribly bitten."

[jonny5]

It conjures up many disturbing images, you know?

Or worse yet: "Man attempts to scare raccoon by peeing. Gets horribly bitten."

in other news, my raccoons are still viciously cute!

i watched one of them chase a leaf around the roof for 20 minutes the other day

[nash87]

friend asked me to tell her a bedtime story and i remembered this. shame that youtube link doesn't work anymore in the original post cause i can't recall what it was

[options]

thank you for sharing this story. I feel better than I did a few minutes ago

[antron]

does anyone remember what was in the link?