Movies you've just watched

[Lord Satori]

I read the above post, and I don't think I'll ever take any of your movie reviews seriously again...

[Skykid]

I read the above post, and I don't think I'll ever take any of your movie reviews seriously again...

I don't think you ever did, but that's because you don't know anything about movies.

[Lord Satori]

First off, I wasn't even being serious. Second off, your pedestal is so high up it would reach the moon.

[Skykid]

First off, I wasn't even being serious. Second off, your pedestal is so high up it would reach the moon.

Maybe, but it's only relevant to the opinions fostered around it. If there were more drauches, emperorings, Monikers to debate among it would be a pedestal proportionately smaller in appearance.

[BIL]

The Raid 2: Berandal Excellent martial arts/action movie, and a great sequel. Same winning combo of spectacular fight choreography and dispassionate, unflinching ultraviolence. A much larger and weightier movie than the original's leaner Die Hard scenario, but also better paced and better written. Where the first slams to a halt for unskippable brotime schmaltz before mercifully blasting off again, this one slowly but consistently gathers to shattering momentum. The gangland war of succession plot is nothing special but executed with gusto and totally inobtrusive, job done.

I did find the relative lack of guns incongruous at times given the mob scenario (assassination by beatdown is apparently the preferred MO), and there are a couple of overtly fantastical antagonists undreamed of by the stone-faced original, but it's a sequel easily worth suspending a little more disbelief for.

[Sly Cherry Chunks]

Who's ready for some more Transformers?

[Some-Mist]

dat transformers rotten tomatoes is dipping fast as all hell - admittedly... I've never watched an entire one all the way through. made it part way through the 1st one and never watched 2 or 3. probably gonna skip o_o


saw Dr. Strangelove as a "movie in the park" at Wicker Park Chicago last night and got trashed with a buncha friends and rewatched (for the 4th time) a great film. Peter Sellers man...

next movies in the park are The Sandlot and then Hunt for Red October. Can anyone think of the theme this year? it's usually one actor associated with all 3 movies... and I couldn't figure it out until they told us last night.

[Mischief Maker]

dat transformers rotten tomatoes is dipping fast as all hell - admittedly... I've never watched an entire one all the way through. made it part way through the 1st one and never watched 2 or 3. probably gonna skip o_o


saw Dr. Strangelove as a "movie in the park" at Wicker Park Chicago last night and got trashed/rewatched (for the 4th time) a great film. Peter Sellers man...

next movies in the park are The Sandlot and then Hunt for Red October. Can anyone think of the theme this year? it's usually one actor associated with all 3 movies... and I couldn't figure it out until they told us last night.

Is James Earl Jones in the Sandlot? Never saw that one. That's my guess for the theme.

[Some-Mist]

man... you nailed it. yea he is - he was a blind ex-baseball player neighbor.

Spoiler

James Earl Jones played a role in all 3 which was surprising because I never noticed him in Dr. Strangelove before. I was kinda surprised they chose those 3 movies when they could've chosen lion king or star wars.

last years was Jeff Goldblum which was easier to guess since it was Jurassic Park, Independence Day, and The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension

[Mischief Maker]

last years was Jeff Goldblum which was easier to guess since it was Jurassic Park, Independence Day, and The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension

I'd have chosen Deathwish, The Fly, and The Life Aquatic.

[Lord Satori]

Think I've said this before, but I've only seen the first Transformers awhile ago. I remember being somewhat entertained, but not enough for me to want to see the sequel when it came out. Part of me thinks that if the Transformers movies were their own original series instead of a reimagining of the cartoon, people would hate it a lot less.

[BIL]

IDGAF about Transformers, the inevitable 80s kid fondness for The Animated Movie aside. First Bay movie is meh. Second is shit. Third dialled up the warring a bit and reached the pinnacle of the trilogy: eh. I didn't know the fourth was even out. Prediction: buhhh.

If they involved rougly 99% less smarmy human bullshit and concentrated on awesome robots warring the fuck out, coincidentally like the Animated Movie, people would hate them a lot less. They can be pretty fun when a robot gets its spine ripped out or head blown off, less so with a sweaty doucheface mcjewfro going "OHH NONONONONOOO" to hilarious effect as he's mercilessly brought to spurting climax by a sentient, randy and furiously sodomising photocopier. edit: Or killing Starscream singlehandedly - same difference.

[Sly Cherry Chunks]

sentient, randy and furiously sodomising photocopier.

er, I believe he was called Laserbeak.

[BIL]

Unlike some of his other warriors, he never fails him!

[Some-Mist]

last years was Jeff Goldblum which was easier to guess since it was Jurassic Park, Independence Day, and The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension

I'd have chosen Deathwish, The Fly, and The Life Aquatic.

much better choices tho I haven't seen deathwish. still - it's mostly just an opportunity to get trashed with hundreds of people in the park so it really doesn't matter what we're watching.

[BIL]

Who's ready for some more Transformers?

Ooh, I am now! Someone contact skyboy on his ponyternet quick! ^__^;;

[Moniker]

I did find the relative lack of guns incongruous at times given the mob scenario (assassination by beatdown is apparently the preferred MO)

This rankled me a bit as well. There were a couple of excellent beat-downs followed by head-shots, but definitely missed the gunplay element from the first film.

[Skykid]

The Transformers movies are trash of the highest Hollywood caliber. The first one was fucking awful, I didn't bother after that.

However...

The city's first IMAX theatre opens tonight with Godzilla and Transformers 4. Although that's like opening an establishment and inviting people to come in and smear themselves in shit, my student got a few tickets to Transformers 4 tomorrow. Although I'd rather spend two hours looking at her cleavage (and I might, all things considered) that does mean I've accepted the freebie and will be subjecting myself to the same scripting, aimless CG, pathetic excuse for actors, and formula film-making for retards 101 that I suffered in Godzilla.

Full report pending.

[Lord Satori]

Your opinion of Godzilla seems to get worse and worse every time you post. I understand and even accept some of the points you make, but it seems that what makes or breaks a movie like that is whether the individual is pessimistic or not, (of course this is just a hypothesis, which of course means it'll probably be ridiculed) and you seem to be supremely pessimistic when it comes to movies.

Anyway, a free movie's a free movie. This way if it sucks, it doesn't matter because you didn't spend a dime (unless you get snacks), and if it doesn't, you'll be pleasantly surprised.

[Squire Grooktook]

Anyway, a free movie's a free movie. This way if it sucks, it doesn't matter because you didn't spend a dime (unless you get snacks), and if it doesn't, you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Not having watched Godzilla, and having no stake in this argument: To be fair, even a movie/game/book/etc. that's free still costs time which is very valuable indeed.

I hear this argument from friends trying to get me to play games I have zero interest in (Uncharted, God of War, etc.), and this is generally my response.

[Skykid]

Your opinion of Godzilla seems to get worse and worse every time you post. I understand and even accept some of the points you make, but it seems that what makes or breaks a movie like that is whether the individual is pessimistic or not, (of course this is just a hypothesis, which of course means it'll probably be ridiculed) and you seem to be supremely pessimistic when it comes to movies.

This is becoming cyclical.

As I explained - and this time think about the words before fornulating a response - it's not pessimism, it's criticism.

I don't pay for a movie wanting to hate it, and with Godzilla I went in expecting to get a good show because the director was responsible for Rise of the Planet of the Apes, which was indeed a good show.

My opinion on it hasn't wavered, it's been consistent.

You have a belief that it's all down to negativity, pessimism and a lack of ability to suspend one's disbelief. I'll say it again: you're wrong.

It's up to the film makers to ensure my suspension of disbelief if not by anything credible then at least something entertaining and not marred by weaknesses and painful formulaic error.

The division between us is simple: I see the flaws, and you wouldn't even know where to look. As I said, you are the majority, you are what makes a box office sing. Without you, none of this on-repeat garbage would continue to be funded to the tune of hundreds of millions of dollars, or double it in profit.

The American institute of making commercial produce for those with an inability to see crap for what it is recruited you and most like you from an early age. The less you question, the less you self educate, the easier it is for them to make billions of notes by following the movie equivalent of a gamefaq.

[Lord Satori]

So apparently liking the Godzilla movie makes me someone who doesn't question things or educate himself. I think I understand where you think you have me pegged, and quite frankly, I'm sick of your complete lack of regard for anybody elses opinion but your own, and treat them as absolutely irrefutable facts.

You say its criticism, and while that may be true, I know people who are aware of the problems Godzilla had, and hold it in a higher regard than you do. I used the word pessimism because I suspected that you have a harder time noticing/appreciating a movie's positive aspects after you notice the negative ones, whereas I am somewhat the opposite.

[Skykid]

So apparently liking the Godzilla movie makes me someone who doesn't question things or educate himself.

Yes! I think you're starting to get it.

I think I understand where you think you have me pegged, and quite frankly, I'm sick of your complete lack of regard for anybody elses opinion but your own, and treat them as absolutely irrefutable facts.

How can I possibly be disregarding people's opinions when I work so hard to correct them? Makes no sense.

Of course I state my argument as fact. What would be the point in arguing something I didn't believe in?

You say its criticism, and while that may be true, I know people who are aware of the problems Godzilla had, and hold it in a higher regard than you do.

Well there's little to nothing in the movie to hold in high regard - or any regard. At a push you could praise the special effects team, but that's about it. So that means the people you're referencing are just as ill-informed as you. You know why that's not surprising? Because you're the majority.

I used the word pessimism because I suspected that you have a harder time noticing/appreciating a movie's positive aspects after you notice the negative ones, whereas I am somewhat the opposite.

This is the last time I'm going to give you the courtesy of an informative response. After this anything you say in idiocy will be countered with barbarism.

It is not 'pessimism' to recognise flaws in a production that reduce the whole from entertainment to grinding drudgery. If the positives you believe are there outweigh the negatives, I would be satisfied I got what I came for in a piece of light entertainment, the way I have been within the Hollywood genre for many years.

I therefore request you flip your own backward logic on its head: I suspect (not really, I know) you have a hard time seeing the flaws and therefore are much more likely to enjoy two hours of the same whizbangerry, awful performance, and toilet paper scripting you saw in the same ten movies already earlier in the year.

You're partly to blame for the inadequacy, but not as much as the commercial industry mill that has sought to dumb you down and sell you fancy looking crap since the day you exited the womb. Your ignorance is their dollar, and they're damn good at what they do. That, at least, I can regard as exceptional work.

Do I expect you to understand considering this is the ninth attempt at an explanation? No. The world isn't that lucky, and it's never been plain sailing to convince someone who can't see the woods for the trees that there is in fact a wood there at all.

But you can't say I didn't try, my small contribution to a dying star.

[President_Obama]

Similar argument I have with friends and family about 'reality' TV shit. They watch it and they know it's shit, yet they continue to watch it. Because they continue to watch it, the producers continue to make it and the culture continues to be degraded and society continues to decline.

[Mischief Maker]

Similar argument I have with friends and family about 'reality' TV shit. They watch it and they know it's shit, yet they continue to watch it. Because they continue to watch it, the producers continue to make it and the culture continues to be degraded and society continues to decline.

Reality TV goes deeper than that. "Survivor" was created during a writer's strike and played out exactly like you'd expect a show written by a bunch of MBAs. It's essentially a fraternity hazing writ large.

Reality TV is some of the cheapest entertainment television you can make, it gives studios leverage during union negotiations, and a lot of these shows star relatives or friends-of-relatives of the network's executives. Ratings alone are not what's keeping this bullshit afloat.

[Sly Cherry Chunks]

How To Train Your Dragon 2: ****

Even though I never saw the first movie, I enjoyed this one more than I expected to. The flying scenes were done quite well, and although the aesthetics are quite different, I found myself reminded a lot of games like Panzer Dragoon by this. There are a couple of places where the CG feels like it breaks down a bit, but that's just a minor nitpick. Also, Toothless is just a really well-done character.

Spoiler

Must be awesome - to be a little kid, having grown up with the first move and the light-hearted cartoon series - to get a sequel this dark. All your favourite characters are now grown up and rugged and badass. I was thinking 'Empire Strikes Back' throughout the entire thing, to the extent that the rushed ending felt forced-on by executive meddling. They set it up for a great sequel: Stoik is dead, Toothless and the dragons have gone off with the bad guy, I was expecting it to end as Hiccup looks off into that sunrise, finally accepting his responsibility as chief. Sadly, the ending quickly and clumsily tidied everything up to the extent that I don't really care what the sequel will be about. (and I'm sure the will be a sequel.) There didn't seem to be an interesting loose threads.

This is also the first movie I've seen in a long while with kids full-on wailing through the sad bits.

[Leandro]

Just seen The Raid 2 - I liked the first one better... This one' still good but longer than I'd want for this kind of fighting action movie, a bit bloated and a downer

[lilmanjs]

Bayside Shakedown 2.
As if you couldn't do better than the first, they really quite did. A few different cases twisting around a major case of CEOs being killed off. The lady who they put in charge of the CEO case was an ass though, but all and all a good movie. I wasn't sure what to expect for one of the highest grossing movies in Japan, but turned out to be good. Now to see if I can find the Junkie XL remix to listen to that is listed in the credits.

[Volteccer_Jack]

Visited my brother and we ended up renting Escape Plan between 3s sessions. Worth the price of admission, but the price was a dollar, so make of that what you will.

A lot of time and effort is spent on making the impression of a "serious" movie, which feels weird because it's so clearly a cheap action flick. You can see it occasionally on the actors, like a kid trying to perform a practical joke and having a hard time keeping a straight face. Arnold doesn't even try to keep a straight face; he just incorporates a perpetual low-level amusement into the character. I can't call it a good movie, the plot is stupid, the action is scarce, and all the secondary characters are just clumsy approximations of people for the primary characters to talk at. But it's all a big showcase for Sly and Arnold, basically a movie about the two of them talking to each other and some explosions and crap on the side. They both perform admirably, Sly as The Straight Man and Arnold as The Schwarzenegger, and together they made the two hours reasonably enjoyable.

PS--Using water rotation to deduce which hemisphere they are in would be stupid even if didn't happen immediately after the scene where they use a fucking sextant.

PPS--Holy crap is that 50 Cent as the boring techno geek?!

[null1024]

Pacific Rim.
'S okay. No masterwork of film here, not that I went in expecting one. Plot's paper thin, I'm looking at reviews and laughing like a fucking hyena at anyone who says this movie has brains.

Still, that's not to say it's not fun to look at.

Neat fights, everything had a sense of heft to it. Some awful cliches that had no reason to be there [the two eccentric scientists could fuck off, they were probably the worst thing in the entire film; also the ending is so fucking trite and cliched that I wanted to throw something, the last 35 minutes were a bit of a drag and the fight there wasn't even that cool compared to the previous one], but otherwise, you get what you paid for: giant robots fighting giant monsters. If you expect any more than that, you will be disappointed.

Main characters aren't great, but they do the job. The Drift seems like a really silly concept, but hey. It lets them give the characters immediate chemistry with nothing but a write-off. Otherwise, they'd have to take more time away from the robots fighting, and that's no good.

The movie's inspirations shine a bit too clearly though. Someone on the production staff must have loved Independence Day. Also, Eva. Et cetera, et cetera. Those two seemed the most blatant, though. Most of the ideas seem like they were taken from somewhere else and not twisted enough to at least seem original.

Also, I'm not too keen on the monster design. I did like the look of most of the Jaegers.
and it seemed like they forgot they had a sword the first half of the film

Final verdict? Not a must see, but enjoyable enough. It's a good film to sit down, munch some popcorn to, and see at a giant monster get rocket-punched in the face.

[edit]
Oh, and please, please, please don't even think about the science gaffes the movie makes. It's almost as bad as Armageddon in that regard.

don't open this, some minor to bigish spoilers

Spoiler

like, as cool as it looked, the ship that got used as a sword in Hong Kong had no right to so much as withstand being swung
also, holy fuck, why is that Kaiju flying with wings in space
oh, and the atomic self-destruct in the last fight should have just vaporized everyone present
There's more, but those were the ones that stood out to me the most.

oh, and the ending is just about the same as Independence Day's -- go into enemy territory, drop bomb, dramatic get the hell out scene, end

and I forgot to mention how cute some of the homages were -- my earlier paragraph made it seem like they were all a bad thing