Shmups suck according to mainstream reviewers

[kengou]

I've written up a little article detailing why mainstream reviewers tend to hate on shmups. It includes tons of review excerpts for a lot of games, as well as analysis of common criticisms and my rebuttals. I'd love to hear some comments or discussion!

http://gruegaming.blogspot.com/2008/06/ ... -knew.html

[jpj]

i'm surprised it bothers you that much. don't let misguided reviews get to you, man

[lgb]

Not-so-pro tip: Next time someone bothers you about continues, tell them that's not how you play, instead of telling them that's not how you're supposed to play. Worked for me; I actually got kids (like 10 and below) hooked on Raiden DX.

[Plasmo]

Nice write-up!

Chaos Field - "It's like fighting a fireworks display. Sometimes the enemy blows up. Sometimes you do. There's no strategy; no hook that makes you think about how you'll do better next time."

This was probably the worst excerpt. I can't stop laughing/crying.

[MathU]

"Castle of Shikigami III is a great title for people who enjoy the occasional classic, arcade-style game. However, it has a decided lack of content and doesn't offer much beyond the initial experience."

Oh god does this piss me off. Castle of Shikigami III has extra features coming out the wazoo.

And on Raiden III:
"A purebred '80s throwback, Raiden III hasn't a chance of competing with exciting modern shooters - or even the classics of yesteryear."

This example has nothing to do with difficulty or lack of perspective; the reviewer just doesn't have a clue. It's abundantly clear they have no idea what they're even talking about.

[FIL]

Well Raiden III is a bit old fashioned but the reviewer is still all kinds of wrong.

[kengou]

Not-so-pro tip: Next time someone bothers you about continues, tell them that's not how you play, instead of telling them that's not how you're supposed to play. Worked for me; I actually got kids (like 10 and below) hooked on Raiden DX.

Fair point, I might come off sounding kind of preachy and douche-baggy. But I just do not understand how you could have much fun with shmups unless you played them with the intent of 1CCing, even if you never get there. Otherwise, you'd just credit-feed through it a few times and say "well, that was quick. guess I'm done with this game now."

[kozo]

*claps*

[lgb]

Fair point, I might come off sounding kind of preachy and douche-baggy. But I just do not understand how you could have much fun with shmups unless you played them with the intent of 1CCing, even if you never get there. Otherwise, you'd just credit-feed through it a few times and say "well, that was quick. guess I'm done with this game now."

Just like they can't understand how you can stand to quit and quit and spend so much time on a game that can beaten in "30 minutes".

And on Raiden III:
"A purebred '80s throwback, Raiden III hasn't a chance of competing with exciting modern shooters - or even the classics of yesteryear."

This example has nothing to do with difficulty or lack of perspective; the reviewer just doesn't have a clue. It's abundantly clear they have no idea what they're even talking about.

Sounds like Ikaruga or Gradius V fanboyism. "Exciting modern shooters"?

[Dave_K.]

I've written up a little article detailing why mainstream reviewers tend to hate on shmups.

You should probably check out Insomnia.ac if you haven't already.

[kengou]

You should probably check out Insomnia.ac if you haven't already.

Wow that does look really interesting, thanks!

[Rob]

Ikaruga: 81, 85, 88 (DC, GC, 360 respectively)

LOL, the game keeps getting better as more people are told they're supposed to like it. Meanwhile every other game in the genre gets worse!

The worst of it is R-Type Final being rated so high, though.

[MX7]

The worst of it is R-Type Final being rated so high, though.

Well, Edge says it's the best shooter ever made, so it must be good.

[FIL]

Well as the length of the game is a common complaint then its no surprise R-Type Final is rated so high, each stage is about a week long, or at least that how it feels when i play it.

[MX7]

Don't forget the fact that it has 4175 ships. This gives the game replay value.

[Frederik]

Don't forget the fact that it has 4175 ships. This gives the game replay value.

TONS OF UNLOCKABLES!!!!!

Gradius V: 82
-Review excerpts that pissed me off:

"Even though its more visually polished than some of the other shooters out there, the lack of innovation and the small number of seven stages makes Gradius V a must for fans of the series only."

What´s funny is that Gradius V is actually ridiculously long.

"It's just too bad that there isn't much to it beyond the standard gameplay. "

Gradius V was so completely non-standard that it even upset some fans of the series for being too different.

Ikaruga: 81, 85, 88 (DC, GC, 360 respectively)
-Review excerpts that pissed me off:

"As fun as it starts out to be, it gets old rather quickly. Fortunately or unfortunately, the game is extremely short, and on its easiest mode can be completed in about an hour."

A true classic. These people are GAME CRITICS. It shows that most people don´t take their job even remotely serious enough. Imagine this sort of incompetence happening in other fields of professional journalism. "This Bob Dylan album sucks because the recording quality just isn´t what people want these days. He also wears very out-of-date clothes on the cover. But what hurts this record most is the fact that he only uses a handful of analogue instruments - nowadays we have moved on and producers like Timbaland have much more to offer in this department with their shiny high-end studio gear. Only for the most hardcore oldies fans."

One might say that, well, it´s just videogames after all, but when people rather grind 20 hours a day in World Of Warcraft for the some jeweled underwear and mistake this for deep, involving game content, while people can´t see REAL replay value - you know, where you can actually LEARN something and have to move a couple of gears in your head instead of pushing the same buttons in the same way one million times more, it´s getting pretty bad.

It´s just a sign people want to sit down on their dough butts and watch interactive movies where you don´t die and don´t get frustrated. Shmups are just too demanding for the modern lethargic gaming masses.

[BIL]

That many review excerpts in such a concentrated dose is like a tactical nuke of ineptitude and bad taste in my eye.

Also, Kengou, TECHNICAL BONUS for the superbly timed and probably accurate photo summary!

[Rob]

Fortunately or unfortunately, the game is extremely short, and on its easiest mode can be completed in about an hour."

A true classic. These people are GAME CRITICS.

"Fortunately or unfortunately" is the best part. That's good reviewing. Leave everything as open-ended as possible so the reader can print it out and circle whichever applies to them.

[Frederik]

But somehow Contra 4 got high scores. Maybe sidescrollers are different. Or maybe it´s the beefy dudes and the guns, who knows...

[FIL]

Its probably down to nostalgia.

[neorichieb1971]

In 20 years they will say the same about FPS and GTA lookalikes.

The fact is, with everything. They should review it for people who know what it is and what it roughly does. Not for people who are looking for a FPS and pick this up by mistake. Reviewing a shmup these days is pointless, because the fan base is more clued up on the genre than the reviewers. I don't know anyone who has bought a shmup based on a professional review since RSG.

Its a bit like cars really. They all get you from A to B, yet some are regarded as something fresh, when in reality its redressed marketing hype. Sure it may have more buttons and knobs and feel slightly more comfortable. But if it does what it says on the tin thats ok for most people. When people buy a shmup, it does what it says on the tin, it scrolls, it has bullets and it kicks major ass. Do I need a twat in an office to tell me if I will like it? Hell no!

[escadrille]

Being hated on by mainstream reviewers is good. It means everybody here is involved in a hardcore niche genre.

[Frederik]

In 20 years they will say the same about FPS and GTA lookalikes.

The fact is, with everything. They should review it for people who know what it is and what it roughly does. Not for people who are looking for a FPS and pick this up by mistake. Reviewing a shmup these days is pointless, because the fan base is more clued up on the genre than the reviewers. I don't know anyone who has bought a shmup based on a professional review since RSG.

That´s a good point, most people don´t even read that many reviews to begin with. Imagine what would happen if all the soccer moms started reading reviews about the shovelware Wii games they pick up, like M&M Kart Racing and all that - all these horrible companies would go bankrupt.

I think ads, box art and word-of-mouth are stronger factors in what games people buy than reviews. And most major review sites are just big hype machines anyways, hosting videos and offering adspace.

[GrimoreLibrarian]

God damn it, no wonder why I don't see Shmups any more. Americans today are so god damned close minded and have an intellect fueled by media.

[kengou]

God damn it, no wonder why I don't see Shmups any more. Americans today are so god damned close minded and have an intellect fueled by media.

A lot of the reviews that make up Metacritic scores and review text excerpts come from European reviewers too, you know. At least one of the excerpts I quoted was clearly European in origin.

I mean, I agree with you for a lot of Americans, but please don't generalize like that. I'm American too and not all of us are dumbasses.

[A_Civilian]

The Raiden III one makes me laugh the most.

The reviewers OBVIOUSLY haven't seen II or I before if they would call III 80s old fashioned.

[CStarFlare]

Here's the deal guys: shmups are a niche genre. They appeal a certain kind of gamer. Mainstream gamers and those who review games for their benefit generally are not that kind of gamer.

But I just do not understand how you could have much fun with shmups unless you played them with the intent of 1CCing, even if you never get there.

And that's the problem. Many people play towards a set goal: specifically, the end of the game. And if you take the attitude that shmups are only enjoyable if you follow self-imposed handicaps (the one credit clear) or towards a vague goal (get a good score), then you've got a conflict between what people want and what people are getting.

In the defense of reviewers, they probably have little choice over what games they review, and if they're not especially interested in a certain game they're probably not going to be able to satisfy hardcore fans who will always cry about how much they just don't fucking get it.

What are they supposed to do, admit that while the game is 30 minutes long and they didn't feel any special need to rerererereplay it for the sake of mastery, there's a small percentage of the gaming population who might so Raiden III deserves a 9/10?

In any case, I'm guessing most of you have been around the block enough times to know that video game reviews might be good for bathroom reading or lulz, but little else. If you're hardcore enough to go into a nerd rage over shmup reviews, you're generally not their audience.

[GrimoreLibrarian]

I learned something from you CStarFlare. Thank you.

[Strider77]

If you're hardcore enough to go into a nerd rage over shmup reviews

STOP!!! beware of NERD RAGE!!!!!

[kozo]

When people buy a shmup, it does what it says on the tin, it scrolls, it has bullets and it kicks major ass. Do I need a twat in an office to tell me if I will like it? Hell no!