THE FOLLOWING REVIEW HAS EYE HARMFUL COLOR PALETTES
VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.
TRASHFALL II (PART IV)
WHAT'S THE PLAN?
REVIEW THE TURDS, SAVE THIS FORUM
Even Lea knows these are "So bad they're laughable".
More trash gaming to ruin your eyes. Today's review is Lizard Lady VS The Cats by The Voices Games.
That's the stupidest name I've ever heard.
Sounds like a joke, Emilie, but The Voices Games threw this [EXPLETIVE] to the PlayStation Store.
NOTE: The game I've played for the review was the "Platinum Edition", 'cos there's a regular one with a broken trophy.
The characters of "Cats" must die!
The creators of Ascendshaft and Dragons in Space are, back and worse than ever.
In this game, you're the eponymous Lizard Lady who is on a "One-Woman's War" against a Cat gang. The reason?, They killed 1,000,000 puppies for no reason and the police don't gives a damn as the newspaper she reads in the opening cutscene says "It's not my problem guv'nor", so, it's up to Lizard Lady to do some Street Justice and erradicate the feline threat once and for all.
The game is a third person shooter on its lowest level imaginable. While you have a gun, its ammo is virtually unlimited since its only "limitations" are the energy gauge that uses, but reloads once you stop firing it. You are granted the ability to Auto-Lock on your enemies as soon they're close enough to point them, fortunately you don't have to be way too close. If you're a amateur of FPS and Third Person shooters, you can even "snipe" them from a far away distance when the sight (white square) turns red. All of your enemies fall with two shots, except the "Boss" characters who take 10 shots or so.
As for the level layout, it's basically the oversimplified version of Doom as each level tries to be a maze-like level, but unlike Doom and Wolfenstein 3D which had a complexity level that required some thinking and exploration, in this game they're too linear and the objective in all five of them (yeah, is that short) is to defeat all the enemies so the green door can open allowing you to advance to the next level. The simplicity of this game is beyond belief since there's no items to help you. No chainguns, no rocket launchers, no laser guns, no medkits, no nothing, only your crappy pistol and that's all. If you die, you'll respawn but the real objective of the game is to complete all the levels unharmed and in a row in order to get the trophies, quitting and picking "Continue" doesn't count.
"Street Justice", that's what you did.
After five levels, this is what you're gonna get: A cliffhanger ending inviting you to "continue" the story in the other game mode.
Oh, Hell no!
Hate to say this, but there's one more mode in this trash bag to play with.
The "Hell Version" of the debug level of Super Mario 64
Lizard Lady VS Herself is the second mode of this game. This is more of a Survival Mode where the objective is to get the most points possible before finally dying out. While Nightmare 1 is a few rooms dungeon, Nightmare 2 makes honor to its name as we have this connected platforms with very limited movement making you prone to fall to your death and Nightmare 3 is an infinite room. Getting 100 points on each room and 1,000 in any of them are the final trophies of this game.
Who's gonna die? The Cats or whoever made this game?
The graphics...ARGH, MY [EXPLETIVE] EYES!!, They're cornea-breaking. This blindess inducing mess of black colors will make you think if the game was badly programmed or if your PlayStation 4 is broken, but they're that horribly bad. There's a few instances where the rooms are black areas that block visibility, that's not challenge, its idiocy on its worst. If the colors are bad, the textures are repulsive at the point that the protagonist looks like a deformed clay figure. Speaking of characters, Lizard Lady's appearance will change throughout the levels, from a normal woman wearing a lizard scale-themed leotard to a full lizard-like bodysuit, a purple skinned humanoid in a green leotard and a girl in a lizard-like tank top and shorts. The "Cats" look like poorly done Batman ripoffs with childish-like cat mustache. As for the music, you have this bad industrial-metal soundtrack that makes things even more boring.
Thanks Nina.
Lizard Lady VS The Cats (both standard and Platinum Edition) are insult AND injury for you and your PlayStation 4 as it makes you wonder why the authorities do not intervene to stop The Voices Games from releasing more garbage like this. But looks like trash gaming is the philosophy of this developer since they've made a "Sequel" called Lady in a Leotard with a Gun.
Unfortunately, this clearly means one thing: The "Trashfall" will continue.
Looks like Emilie's sanity was "Emilienated" with this game.