Movies you've just watched

[Air Master Burst]

I mean, "Who the Predator considers worthy of hunting" is pretty variable from story to story (and really, Predator to Predator). Like, somehow Topher Grace was considered worthy jungle combat prey? If the woman in Predator 1 had been running around armed like the rest of them it absolutely would have hunted her too.

Predators would have been just fine with Kurosawa since she's, you know, a trained warrior who kills Xenomorphs. I believe the only current canon examples of blooded humans are both women, so it would stand to reason that sex or gender have nothing to do with a Predator's judgement.

ETA: Also, I believe the AVP Dutch is actually a cyborg based on the original, but it's been a while since I researched the cancelled movie script that game was apparently loosely based on.

[BIL]

The Dark Horse story arc that was (badly) repurposed into AVP1 makes a pointed observation of Yautja society early on, that their females are referred to by the derisive term "baby-makers," and expected to know their place.

I suppose it could be more of a sociological than biological explanation - in most typical human societies, over the vast majority of recorded history, women were indeed "baby-makers" exempt from active combat roles - because putting your generally smaller, weaker, less aggressive (and infinitely less expendable) sex on the front line is civilisational suicide. That's reserved for desperate times, much like the guerrilla insurgency Anna is part of in Predator.

Going by that Dark Horse arc, it's true, Kurosawa would've soon been regarded as a capable warrior the moment the Preds realised her superhuman combat ability. The ominous ending says as much.

Then again (aw jeez, this takes me back to COOLEGE), biology tends to inform sociology. Still, whatever explanation you ascribe women's typical non-combatant roles to, that's squarely where Anna is punted back into by Predator, while the men fight on and die.

How sad that an arcade beltscroller is the more compelling treatment of the comics arc. Imagine some of that shit going down on even a direct-to-TV movie, let alone a full theatrical release. 3: The fatal flaw of both AVP movies is a lack of credible human opposition. Imagine Aliens and Predator if the marines and mercs were a bunch of maintenance works. Zzzzzz.

[drauch]

Ehhh, I mean, the camera doesn't focus on Anna because she isn't a main character--she's a plot device. She's there to provide fear of the unknown, providing some context to the disfigured bodies and how this shit has been happening, that something is out there, and like BIL mentioned, hunting dudes for trophy hunts. It's the same macho schtick of rich whitey hunting elephants and lions and other vaguely 'threating' prey.

Commando: Arnold was the star. I mean, he's Adonis, an insane individual--the dude you're watching the movie for. Chong's character is great, but the movie is about him. I think if anything I'm more appreciative for not just making her a sex object, and instead a comical partner shooting rockets and shit backwards.

I dunno, I just don't see these as homoerotic at all for focusing on the lead, or with any gay subtext, unlike something like Nightmare on Elm Street 2 from around the same time.

[Air Master Burst]

Not quite! The "baby-maker" insult wasn't one that was widely used out loud among Predators, since at the time female Preds were portrayed as MUCH stronger and more powerful than the males, to the point that the males would occasionally be severely injured during mating. Basically a slur that would get your ass kicked for saying in the wrong company!

As far as female Predators hunting and fighting, well, there's always Big Mama, and Deadliest of the Species was part of the same early-90s Dark Horse run.

ETA:

Ehhh, I mean, the camera doesn't focus on Anna because she isn't a main character--she's a plot device. She's there to provide fear of the unknown, providing some context to the disfigured bodies and how this shit has been happening, that something is out there, and like BIL mentioned, hunting dudes for trophy hunts. It's the same macho schtick of rich whitey hunting elephants and lions and other vaguely 'threating' prey.

Commando: Arnold was the star. I mean, he's Adonis, an insane individual--the dude you're watching the movie for. Chong's character is great, but the movie is about him. I think if anything I'm more appreciative for not just making her a sex object, and instead a comical partner shooting rockets and shit backwards.

I dunno, I just don't see these as homoerotic at all for focusing on the lead, or with any gay subtext, unlike something like Nightmare on Elm Street 2 from around the same time.

It's not just WHO the camera focuses on, but HOW. Compare the way the camera ogles Arnold and company in Predator to the way the camera ogles any female character in like a Michael Bay movie, or some other modern straight action flick. Notice how there is no such ogling of the only female character in Predator. Hell, most "straight" action movies include scenes of their main characters hitting on or ogling or having sex with women! You just don't see that much in the big beefy 80s macho stuff, and if they do sleep with a woman, she's guaranteed to be fridged in short order so our hero can go back to groping other dudes. How many times is an almost-naked Mel Gibson writhing suggestively while being "tortured" by some other dude without a woman in sight? Dolph Lundgren was basically a living Tom of Finland drawing in every action movie he was in!

[BIL]

Not quite! The "baby-maker" insult wasn't one that was widely used out loud among Predators, since at the time female Preds were portrayed as MUCH stronger and more powerful than the males, to the point that the males would occasionally be severely injured during mating. Basically a slur that would get your ass kicked for saying in the wrong company!

As far as female Predators hunting and fighting, well, there's always Big Mama, and Deadliest of the Species was part of the same early-90s Dark Horse run.

Are you sure we're talking about the same arc? That's absolutely not how it's portrayed in the one I'm talking about.

[Air Master Burst]

The first AVP arc only has a couple of Predators, but that's before Machiko goes and lives with them in AVP2, which might be what you're thinking of. Haven't read AVP2 in a while but there might be some long-since-retconned stuff in there. Deadliest of the Species was the 3rd major AVP comics arc, and females weren't portrayed as inferior or subservient at all in that one (probably because it was written by Chris Claremont who likely wasn't having any of that nonsense).

[BIL]

Yeah, I think it must've been one of the very early publications where I read that. At the time it made me think of Star Trek's Ferengi.

[rapoon]

I never felt this was a war-glamourising film, despite the source novel's author criticising it as such. It's a punishing, grimy, exhausting treatment of armed service - for all the grit and valour shown, the enduring sentiment is one of terrible futility. I suppose the rare admiring shots of the U-boat skimming along to gallant music, the sea-sprayed sailors whooping and hollering with delight, are a little romanticising... but as someone whose paternal family was bombed in their houses by Nazi Germany, and whose maternal family were torpedoed at sea by them, I still don't think they're misplaced. They're a glimpse of innocent human potential and ingenuity, the wondrous machine given some reprieve from the horrid purpose men set it to. Warfare is only ever shown to be terrifying and agonising, the film's overriding emotion a longing to be anywhere else.

An easy recommendation for any fan of slow-burning war thrillers, even at its epic runtime.

Was going to respond to you in the deadpool thread, but this is obviously a more appropriate place.

Great write-up, and couldn't agree more. I never imagined Das Boot glamorizing sub life any more than Cross of Iron glamorized life on the eastern front; that is to say, it looks wretched.

I'm impatiently holding off on another viewing till I finish Dead Wake, where Larson vividly describes the conditions aboard SM U-20 (different war, yes, but point still stands): a single latrine amongst ~40 men that blew back it's contents if flushed while submerged, not showering / bathing for weeks, sharing of beds, machinery that constantly expelled oil vapors the crew would consume via drink and food, and air so tepid it left condensation on everything, encouraged mold, and regularly exceeded 100 fahrenheit. fuck that.

[BIL]

Was thinking of The Cross Of Iron during my rewatch, they're synonymous to me as portrayals of "the other side" - I'm a due a rewatch of that one too.

[Sengoku Strider]

Youtube threw a '10 cosmic horror movies you should watch' video at me. I never read Lovecraft and don't watch much horror, but the ideas behind cosmic horror definitely fascinate me, so I took them up on the offer to check out a bunch of it condensed.

Alas the only movies recommended that appear to be on Netflix ATM are The Void and The Thing. I watched each over the past two evenings.

The Void: C grade dialogue and delivery. It was clearly written by someone who took a "There must be conflict on screen every 3 minutes or the audience will lose interest!" screenwriting program in college. So characters shout at each other and posture for dominance over every little thing, when they could far more effectively address their situation by not acting 6 years old at each turn. This style of writing is so, so obnoxious and has taken over all sorts of media and genres the past decade and a half. "I'M DRIVEN AND INTENSE AND CONFIDENT AND WON'T TAKE CRAP FROM ANYONE!!!11" no, you're a dialogue contrivance that no functional human being should identify with.

Fortunately, the horror stuff was really creepy and well done (at least to someone who doesn't watch a lot of it and isn't already immersed in the tropes). And when things pick up in the second half, the dialogue gets to take a back seat which instantly improves the acting immensely. I feel like this is one of those movies that would have had a cult following had it been made in the 1980s, but would have also been one of those movies that had to suggest or imply all sorts of grand goings-on but not actually show them on screen, and ended up somewhat unsatisfying for it. Luckily we live in an era where even an Indie Gogo movie like this one can afford to lather on CGI and depict elaborate settings on screen. Also, the creature work used practical effects and was unsettling & well done. The whole thing gave off major Silent Hill vibes, I think the creators clearly must have played it.

The Thing 2011: I'm sure I saw the 1982 version years ago, but remember very little about it. To the point that I thought I was watching a digital remaster of it until after it was done (I was amazed at how well the clothes & hairstyles had aged!). It's got a bunch of monster effects CTRL-V'd directly out of a mid-period Resident Evil game. There were some really clumsy edits with poor continuity, and scenes that should have been cut altogether by a more disciplined editor. But they still got some great jump scares, some great tension, and Mary Elizabeth Winstead as an adorable palaeontologist who knows how to handle a flame thrower would be 1000% waifu material if anyone still used that word. My final impression was that even though The Thing (2011) is a prequel to The Thing (1982) it felt like a better sequel to Aliens than any of the sequels to Aliens.

[BIL]

The Void is a solid minor effort, imo. As you say, the real stars are the setting and creature effects... I especially enjoyed the unassuming transition from mere dilapidated grime to outright spacetime-warping nightmare - totally reminiscent of KCET's Silent Hill quartet, where any unassuming door or hallway might harbour a point of no return. Very decent Nightmare Labyrinth movie, once it gets going.

Wasn't a fan of the overly human antagonist, but the film is strong enough that I can write him off as warped into part of its cosmic milieu - I'm the same way with Stuart Gordon's generally superior From Beyond, a very loose Lovecraft adaptation much like its spiritual forerunner The Reanimator (same director and stars). Knowingly a little campy, both, being effectively black horror/comedies, but by the same unpretentious token, they pack some genuinely unsettling material. Beloved cult favourites, both.

Outside of print, I think the best HPL stuff is still the Dark Adventure Radio Theatre's series of audio dramas. They're beautifully-adapted and voiced, right down to the period-accurate advertisements ("9 out of 10 physicians prefer our smokes!")

[Mischief Maker]

I wish I could find a clip on youtube of HPLHS's Call of Cthulhu movie where a guy falls down "an angle that shouldn't have been there"

It's got a bunch of monster effects CTRL-V'd directly out of a mid-period Resident Evil game.

Prepare to cry.

[BIL]

I wish I could find a clip on youtube of HPLHS's Call of Cthulhu movie where a guy falls down "an angle that shouldn't have been there"

Absolutely bone-chilling. I always forget the HPL Historical Society are the guys behind Dark Adventure Radio Theatre and those films, too! (including The Whisperer In Darkness) It's been forever since I checked back in with them, they may well have more for all I know.

EDIT: Aww hell yeah, they've been busy. Imma listen to some of those this weekend.

[xxx1993]

Paws of Fury: The Legend of Hank. Pretty fun!

[BryanM]

I checked to see if they ever made more than the two Silent Hill movies, nope. A future hypothetical Fatal Frame movie came up, and I chuckled at how bad the action scenes would be in third person. Anytime someone shot a ghost with a camera, it'd have to be nearly all first person to work.

... I discovered there's a japanese Fatal Frame movie. Well now.

[xxx1993]

DC League of Super-Pets was also fun!

[cj iwakura]

I've always wanted to see The Void, but I have a low tolerance for body horror(even though I love cosmic stuff). Certain scenes from The Colour Out of Space were a lot.


Bullet Train was legit. Tons of fun and lot of great character acting, especially from Brad Pitt, who was having a field day.

[BIL]

From what I remember, it's never as extreme as Colour's most twisted centerpiece. Relies more on implication where defiled bodies are concerned, though the creature and labyrinth effects are balls to the wall. Five-star shotgun blasts to mewling meatwalls.

I don't know how I forgot about the Nic Cage COOS adaptation - wasn't bad at all, imo. There's also Die Farbe, a German effort with the interesting stylistic choice of shooting in black-and-white, save for the titular menace itself. While neither is my ideal - both deviate from HPL's minimalism in ways I'd rather they hadn't - they're very respectable capturings of the broad strokes. Dark Adventure Radio Theatre has a dynamite radio drama-styled adaptation, superbly picturesque.

[xxx1993]

Bullet Train was legit. Tons of fun and lot of great character acting, especially from Brad Pitt, who was having a field day.

Easily one of the best movies of the year. It's probably my second favorite behind Top Gun: Maverick.

[drauch]

I don't know how I forgot about the Nic Cage COOS adaptation

Man, I forgot all about this as well. I didn't care for Dust Devil when I first saw it 10+ years ago, but I like Hardware quite a bit. Stanley is an odd dude. I got some odd vibes from the trailer which initially put me off, hence forgetting it happened. Does it take itself serious? I'm obviously fine with the dark humor of the Gordon films, but I was afraid it was a bit much.

[xxx1993]

Seoul Vibe on Netflix. Pretty fun!

[BIL]

I don't know how I forgot about the Nic Cage COOS adaptation

Man, I forgot all about this as well. I didn't care for Dust Devil when I first saw it 10+ years ago, but I like Hardware quite a bit. Stanley is an odd dude. I got some odd vibes from the trailer which initially put me off, hence forgetting it happened. Does it take itself serious? I'm obviously fine with the dark humor of the Gordon films, but I was afraid it was a bit much.

Man I love Hardware, I couldn't believe how raunchy it got with that perv dude narrating his peep session on the leading lady. Also Lemmy! I actually forgot Stanley was behind both.

His Colour has a little levity added in, with the setting and characters updated from dour 1900s farm folk to a more 90s sitcom format. Slightly kooky Dad, long-suffering Mom, and a fractious pack of kids. Nic Cage takes his rage out on that first offending tomato, slam-dunking it with all his might into the kitchen bin.

That said, it's never overtly comedic, or even black-comedic; probably played straighter than Reanimator/Beyond, once shit hits the fan. Some memorably twisted bodyhorror, and a few really eerie shots. It's a little loud overall for my liking - my main takeaway from the text is always a sense of invisible, inescapable corruption, silently burning through the people, their crops, and the land itself. Here things are a lot more OTT. Still, convincingly cosmic, and works fine in the adaptation's context.

I'd say give it a shot, and not just because so many HPL screen adaptations tend to choke balls.

[xxx1993]

Me Time was pretty decent.

[cj iwakura]

I don't know how I forgot about the Nic Cage COOS adaptation

Man, I forgot all about this as well. I didn't care for Dust Devil when I first saw it 10+ years ago, but I like Hardware quite a bit. Stanley is an odd dude. I got some odd vibes from the trailer which initially put me off, hence forgetting it happened. Does it take itself serious? I'm obviously fine with the dark humor of the Gordon films, but I was afraid it was a bit much.

Man I love Hardware, I couldn't believe how raunchy it got with that perv dude narrating his peep session on the leading lady. Also Lemmy! I actually forgot Stanley was behind both.

His Colour has a little levity added in, with the setting and characters updated from dour 1900s farm folk to a more 90s sitcom format. Slightly kooky Dad, long-suffering Mom, and a fractious pack of kids. Nic Cage takes his rage out on that first offending tomato, slam-dunking it with all his might into the kitchen bin.

That said, it's never overtly comedic, or even black-comedic; probably played straighter than Reanimator/Beyond, once shit hits the fan. Some memorably twisted bodyhorror, and a few really eerie shots. It's a little loud overall for my liking - my main takeaway from the text is always a sense of invisible, inescapable corruption, silently burning through the people, their crops, and the land itself. Here things are a lot more OTT. Still, convincingly cosmic, and works fine in the adaptation's context.

I'd say give it a shot, and not just because so many HPL screen adaptations tend to choke balls.

The finale was definitely the highlight, it was full-on Carpenter Brut insanity.

[BIL]

I especially loved this shot - like being gazed at from within the abyss, brr. Pricelessly eerie juxtaposition of homey comfort and brain-melting horror.

Spoiler

[vol.2]

oh yeah, I haven't seen Hardware since the 90s, and I'm sure I watched it on a crappy pan and scan VHS tape, so it will be fun to watch the theatrical.


I watched on Wed night Monster Squad 7/10

I also haven't watched this one since I was a kid. It was a fun movie, with some really nice touches. The dad/son relationship is actually done pretty well, it's not super deep or anything, but there is an acceptable amount character development and representation of interpersonal relationships. The monsters are all pretty good costume-wise, the best being the Creature from the Black Lagoon; it's a shame it doesn't really get any screen time at all. Dracula, on the other hand, is a bit too hammy and gets lots of screen time, but it's not unbearable.

Nothing too much to say here outside of it being just what you'd expect from a classic horror team up for kids, outside of some good performances like Tom Noonan as Frankenstein's Monster (he was also in Manhunter and Synecdoche, New York).

Shout outs to the fun practical effects and the cringy 80s dialog; it brought me right back.

[BIL]

Tom Noonan is always great as tall, imposing, yet faintly sympathetic villains and anti-heroes. I actually didn't realise how tall he was (6'5) until watching Manhunter - I'd always read his Cain from Robocop 2 as the unassuming-looking arch-crimeboss type, ala Red Foreman's Clarence Boddicker from the first film. Way more memorable as the Red Dragon than Ralph Fiennes, though I prefer the latter's sendoff in his film.

EDIT: *Kurtwood Smith's Clarence Boddicker >_>

[emphatic]

Me Time was pretty decent.

Decent is a not a word I'd choose. The trailer toned down just how indecent it was. And ugh, Mark Wahlberg looks old and tired in it.

[xxx1993]

Samaritan was really good, though!

[Stevens]

oh yeah, I haven't seen Hardware since the 90s, and I'm sure I watched it on a crappy pan and scan VHS tape, so it will be fun to watch the theatrical.


I watched on Wed night Monster Squad 7/10

I also haven't watched this one since I was a kid. It was a fun movie, with some really nice touches. The dad/son relationship is actually done pretty well, it's not super deep or anything, but there is an acceptable amount character development and representation of interpersonal relationships. The monsters are all pretty good costume-wise, the best being the Creature from the Black Lagoon; it's a shame it doesn't really get any screen time at all. Dracula, on the other hand, is a bit too hammy and gets lots of screen time, but it's not unbearable.

Nothing too much to say here outside of it being just what you'd expect from a classic horror team up for kids, outside of some good performances like Tom Noonan as Frankenstein's Monster (he was also in Manhunter and Synecdoche, New York).

Shout outs to the fun practical effects and the cringy 80s dialog; it brought me right back.

Haha. Been a few years, but the Mrs. and I have watched it within the last five or so. Still solid, especially around Halloween.