Amusingly bad reviews

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Cagar
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Cagar »

PAPER/ARTILLERY wrote:How is it that now in 2014 when videogames are bigger than ever, we don't have any dedicated gaming TV shows? Am I forgetting something here or its that just weird?
Because now in 2014 the majority of gaming demographic doesn't give a shit about television, especially when there's twitch.tv
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Bananamatic
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Bananamatic »

PAPER/ARTILLERY wrote:How is it that now in 2014 when videogames are bigger than ever, we don't have any dedicated gaming TV shows? Am I forgetting something here or its that just weird?
TV shows don't come with a chat to spam with kappa and penis ascii
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ciox
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by ciox »

Bananamatic wrote:
PAPER/ARTILLERY wrote:How is it that now in 2014 when videogames are bigger than ever, we don't have any dedicated gaming TV shows? Am I forgetting something here or its that just weird?
TV shows don't come with a chat to spam with kappa and penis ascii
They did in the early 00s, you could send text messages from your mobile phone and have them shown on screen, I haven't seen that since then but I don't really watch TV anymore either.
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Ed Oscuro
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Ed Oscuro »

Cagar wrote:
PAPER/ARTILLERY wrote:How is it that now in 2014 when videogames are bigger than ever, we don't have any dedicated gaming TV shows? Am I forgetting something here or its that just weird?
Because now in 2014 the majority of gaming demographic doesn't give a shit about television, especially when there's twitch.tv
Also kids who can't afford games don't watch shows about them; they just pirate.
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Pretas
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Pretas »

Ed Oscuro wrote:
Cagar wrote:
PAPER/ARTILLERY wrote:How is it that now in 2014 when videogames are bigger than ever, we don't have any dedicated gaming TV shows? Am I forgetting something here or its that just weird?
Because now in 2014 the majority of gaming demographic doesn't give a shit about television, especially when there's twitch.tv
Also kids who can't afford games don't watch shows about them; they just pirate.
Or they watch let's plays on Youtube hosted by their favorite "personalities."
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BareKnuckleRoo
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by BareKnuckleRoo »

Edit:

I was totally right and Giga Wing is completely 1CCable (albeit difficult) without using reflect. VINDICATION!
Last edited by BareKnuckleRoo on Tue Dec 21, 2021 9:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Skykid
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Skykid »

Roodwurm wrote: Have some respect, please. The guy 1CC'd and counterstopped Virtua Cop on Gamesmaster in his teenage years: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgJu0kCiCjQ
Yeah I remember watching that as a kid.

Never knew it would turn out to be a non-entity non-journalist who knows cock-all about games several years later. Bloody disappointing. :(
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Ed Oscuro
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Ed Oscuro »

On the other hand, that's a pretty common pattern. Gain the smallest foot in the door -> stop trying entirely
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AntiFritz
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by AntiFritz »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0q88rXTcEA

Aparently sine moras time mechanics are well implemented and espgaluda seemingly doesn't exist.
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Kiken
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kiken »

AntiFritz wrote:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0q88rXTcEA

Aparently sine moras time mechanics are well implemented and espgaluda seemingly doesn't exist.
Yeah.. it kinda wreaks of not having experienced much of the genre.

And yet he states that it's almost impossible to finish a stage with the time that's allotted... despite that being false... wouldn't that completely contradict his prior statement about how 'well designed' the time-based gameplay is?

Also, he clearly doesn't know about the autofire glitch.
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Kollision
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kollision »

Hmmm
I didn't see anything wrong with that review.
Aesthetical/functional appreciation aside, I thought it was a well made presentation of Sine Mora.
He addresses all the important aspects of the gameplay, even recognizing that in order to score higher you need to refrain from using the ship's special abilitites.
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Cagar »

Kollision wrote:Hmmm
I didn't see anything wrong with that review.
Aesthetical/functional appreciation aside, I thought it was a well made presentation of Sine Mora.
He addresses all the important aspects of the gameplay, even recognizing that in order to score higher you need to refrain from using the ship's special abilitites.
Yeah, exactly.
In order to score higher you need to play in the most boring-ass way possible and the "unique special abilities" become obsolete.
That's pretty solid and short description of why the game is completely idiotic.
It rewards the player for purposefully making it more boring and less complex. Adding that to the fact that the slow pace and un-energetic feel already almost puts you to asleep...
...and random powerups... the list goes on and on..

Also yep, no mention of the auto-fire glitch. He probably didn't even notice.

Sigh... Image

EDIT: Haha I just realized that the game almost rivals against replayability. Because the more you play it, the more you realize how absolutely shitty it is. And if you're already very familiar with shmups when you start... you're not gonna have good time at all.
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Kollision
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kollision »

well, he didn't use autofire in his footage, so why mention autofire break-up? :roll:
Cagar
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Cagar »

Because it's a very dominating glitch in the game, and an oversight that developers realized over a decade ago?
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Doctor Butler »

"The shmup genre lacks ingenuity" = "I'm oblivious to nuance"
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Kollision
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kollision »

Cagar wrote:Because it's a very dominating glitch in the game, and an oversight that developers realized over a decade ago?
What glitch?
Default autofire in Sine Mora is fine. Extra autofire is unnatural.
If you call that a glitch then Darius Gaiden is broken beyond belief.
Cagar
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Cagar »

Extra autofire is unnatural? What on earth are you talking about? :lol:
I referred to it as a glitch because that's what the devs say, according to forum user Tyjet.

For sure it's a bug. It's an unintended feature with negative effects on gameplay. Same thing goes for darius gaiden.
It's just unbelievable that a developer at this day and age makes a mistake like that :lol:
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Kollision
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kollision »

Yeah, tell that to all people who own stock controllers and can't unnaturally autofire.
In the end we always choose how to play our games.
Cagar
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Cagar »

You know that this kind of autofire means that you can shoot faster with literally ANY controller, right?
This system FORCES you to spam the shit out of the shoot button instead of holding it for autofire, because it leads to higher scores. Ok?
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Kollision
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kollision »

Interesting.
I beat the game and never mashed any button in it. :mrgreen:
Cagar
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Cagar »

Yeah when there's nothing left, just nitpick. Well played
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Pretas
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Pretas »

From the front page of GameFAQs, The Top 10 Arcade Space Shooters.

Spoilers: Defender is #1 and three of them aren't even STGs (and Gravitar/Asteroids are debatable).
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Ebbo
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Ebbo »

To be fair the list's description makes it pretty clear his definition of "arcade space shooter" isn't really restricted to shmups. But even with that in mind the list hardly has any substance to it. "This game was kinda popular back in the day so lets put it here".
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Vetus
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Vetus »

http://www.gamefaqs.com/dreamcast/91391 ... view-55101
Giving 4/10 for Cannon Spike because of its short length is hilarious. It's a fucking arcade game, what did he expected? For an arcade game its length is fine. Sure, there are arcade shmups with bigger length but still I prefer it the way it is instead of being bigger yet repetitive and tiring.
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Special World »

Pretas wrote:From the front page of GameFAQs, The Top 10 Arcade Space Shooters.

Spoilers: Defender is #1 and three of them aren't even STGs (and Gravitar/Asteroids are debatable).
Defender is sweet though
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Kiken
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kiken »

Vetus wrote:http://www.gamefaqs.com/dreamcast/91391 ... view-55101
Giving 4/10 for Cannon Spike because of its short length is hilarious. It's a fucking arcade game, what did he expected? For an arcade game its length is fine. Sure, there are arcade shmups with bigger length but still I prefer it the way it is instead of being bigger yet repetitive and tiring.
Loops... how do they work?

The game is close to a half hour when you play through all 20 levels, and several of the boss patterns on loop 2 are pretty intense. I was always glad that Psikyo opted against suicide bullets in this game. Also, the Gunbird 2 hate with this individual is strong. But, you know; dem shmups ain't hard when you can hammer dat continue button! Score be damned!
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by CloudyMusic »

Pretas wrote:From the front page of GameFAQs, The Top 10 Arcade Space Shooters.
"Gradius still lives on in the memory of several people who have played it."
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Kollision
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Kollision »

WE NEVER FORGET YOUR ACTIVITIES!
Cagar
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Cagar »

Keres wrote:
Pretas wrote:From the front page of GameFAQs, The Top 10 Arcade Space Shooters.
"Gradius still lives on in the memory of several people who have played it."
Why am I laughing so much at this :lol:
Way too much
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Blinge
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Re: Amusingly bad reviews

Post by Blinge »

James Rolf and Mike of AVGN fame drop some general ignorance about Salamander/Life Force.

http://cinemassacre.com/2015/03/09/life ... e-mondays/


also this:

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