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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Thu Jan 02, 2020 5:08 pm 


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The problem with TLJ is that Rian Johnson had a handful of really intriguing ideas but not only decided to abandon them but renege on them completely within the film's running time.

Spoiler: show
Rey and Kylo Ren very nearly embark on a new dawn of Jedi but ultimately decide to fall back into their space Jesus and pantomime villain characters respectively, Luke has been in hiding for years potentially discovering the true secrets of the Jedi for a decisive victory but instead he's been hiding there like a coward because he wanted to murder his sister and best friend's son, Snoke was disposed of in a surprisingly deft maneuver but no one was installed to replace him, the film's ending was final rather than having a hook to take you into the next film. And the less said about Holdo's plan the better.


It all felt like really exciting stuff. It's like he had an image in his mind of a good idea but it evaporated by the time he came to write it. I was really hoping for something truly subversive but he just didn't follow through and the film that we were left with was a big pile of salty shit.


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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2020 4:40 am 


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Yeah the themes and ideas are just too muddled, inconsistent, and even incoherent for me to even call it an okay move if taken alone.
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 10:27 pm 


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Saw the latest one last night and to me, it was quite enjoyable. A few cringe moments that made me laugh, but some sweet nods to the originals too. I really enjoy most of JJ Abrams projects. My daughters watched it with me and they both loved it. Perhaps even more than Empire Strikes Back which I can understand on some level, as this one has a lot of cute creatures in it.

Spoiler: show
* Rey stopping the transporter ship mid air with her force powers made me (and only me) laugh out loud
* C3PO having red Vader eyes when translating the Sith message was really funny
* The fact that most storm troopers have female voices feels strange somehow
* Chewbacca receiving a medal made me smile
* The army of ships arriving at the eleventh hour made me grin happily
* The return to Tatooine was bittersweet
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Thu Jan 16, 2020 2:13 pm 


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emphatic wrote:
Spoiler: show
* Rey stopping the transporter ship mid air with her force powers made me (and only me) laugh out loud


That scene make me TERRIBLE CONFLICTED, because

1] I like the idea of TEH FORCE being this ribcage-collapsing, heart-exploding Scanners/Akira shit - not that these gutless fucks ever intended to make good on SPACE MENENDEZ BROS, but I would be down, if they would commit! Youthful indiscretion + POWER IS LOSING CONTROL is always reliable.

2] I REALLY like the idea of beloved furry dogman dying in a horrific YAGAWASPLOSION, flames and burning shrapnel spewing forth - just suits this terminally indecisive shitshow trilogy!

and 3] I LOL HARD @ John Boyega throwing his hands up and going "FUCK, NAWWW" like his dog had just shat all over the couch! It reminded me of Colin Salmon's expression of pure unadulterated ANNOYANCE in PUNISHER: WAR ZONE (so fucking angry! you can hear that Jamaican lilt wreck his MURICA COP accent!)

However it was all for jack fucking shit, just like the rest of the movie (EDIT: just like the rest of the trilogy), so nm. :sad:

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I don't give a fuck. DEATHS ARE SPEAKING:

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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Thu Jan 16, 2020 3:28 pm 


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The fact that Palpatine's broadcast of revenge was ACTUALLY broadcast during a special Fortnite ingame tie-in event (yes, that's the only way you could have heard his 'threat of revenge') makes me LOL so hard. This trilogy is the epitome of sellout dogshit.

But perhaps, it was always this way??
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Last edited by EmperorIng on Thu Jan 16, 2020 4:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Thu Jan 16, 2020 4:09 pm 


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Dogshit, yes, but worse than the Matrix sequels ultimately turning into a giant advertisement for their tie-in MMO?
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Thu Jan 16, 2020 4:23 pm 


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I think this was worth it all.

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If that was in some Super Famicom STG spin-off (IE, where a story like TROS belongs), I'd put it in the Attract Mode thread. So lovable! ESPECIALLY the sheepish little *palpatine's imperator that sneaks in after the dramatic ellipsis. GHOST IMPERATOR sounds like a Battle Garegga ship.

Some YT chap put it best - this trilogy was like a pair of toddlers squabbling in a sandbox over who had the coolest toys. And the sandbox cost $4,000,000,000.
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Thu Jan 16, 2020 10:30 pm 


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Just take Starcrash, literal Starcrash, slap some CGI Ewoks and dead actors from TOS in there, add an exposition crawl at the start that creates some backstory lore/excuse for how it's connected to anything, slap the Star Wars branding on it, and release it as episode X:

Would it do that much worse financially?


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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2020 9:55 am 


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BIL wrote:
GHOST IMPERATOR sounds like a Battle Garegga ship.


Stealing! Yoink!
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RegalSin wrote:
Japan an almost perfect society always threatened by outsiders....................

Instead I am stuck in the America's where women rule with an iron crotch, and a man could get arrested for sitting behind a computer too long.

Aeon Zenith - My STG.


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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2020 9:59 am 


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Now it was worth it :mrgreen:
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2020 7:36 pm 


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BIL wrote:
Now it was worth it :mrgreen:


Nice.

So the leaked Trevorrow episode 9 script might be even worse than the film we got. Jeez, who knew? Disney apparently.
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2020 12:39 am 


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BryanM wrote:
Just take Starcrash, literal Starcrash, slap some CGI Ewoks and dead actors from TOS in there, add an exposition crawl at the start that creates some backstory lore/excuse for how it's connected to anything, slap the Star Wars branding on it, and release it as episode X:

Would it do that much worse financially?


Whoa, my dude! No need to diss Starcrash like that.
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2020 4:42 am 


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it290 wrote:
BryanM wrote:
Just take Starcrash, literal Starcrash, slap some CGI Ewoks and dead actors from TOS in there, add an exposition crawl at the start that creates some backstory lore/excuse for how it's connected to anything, slap the Star Wars branding on it, and release it as episode X:

Would it do that much worse financially?


Whoa, my dude! No need to diss Starcrash like that.
They wouldn't let Caroline Munroe wear that costume in this day and age.
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 Post subject: Re: Star Wars Episode IX released 12/20/2019
PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2020 9:29 pm 


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Sly Cherry Chunks wrote:
They wouldn't let Caroline Munroe wear that costume in this day and age.


That's 'cause she's 71 years old. Even google image search barely begrudgingly shows what she looks like now.


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