shmups.system11.org

Shmups Forum
 
* FAQ    * Search
 * Register  * Login 
It is currently Sun Dec 16, 2018 3:06 am View unanswered posts
View active topics



Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 117 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 12:45 am 


User avatar

Joined: 04 Jul 2011
Posts: 2117
I can't even boil water correctly, so it's take-out all day, every day 8)


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 4:55 am 


User avatar

Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 6190
xbl0x180 wrote:
I can't even boil water correctly, so it's take-out all day, every day 8)


Dude, you're the reason I started this thread :mrgreen:
_________________
Randorama wrote:
ban CMoon for being a closet Jerry Falwell cockmonster/Ann Coulter fan, Nijska a bronie (ack! The horror!), and Ed Oscuro being unable to post 100-word arguments without writing 3-pages posts.
Eugenics: you know it's right!


SHMUP sale page.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 5:36 am 


User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2008
Posts: 4698
Location: Springfield, Missouri, USA
Made a hearty batch of lentils tonight. Found some old, dried peppers that belonged to my whore ex-girlfriend. No idea what they were, but they are like 2 and a half years old. Gave it a little taste, by golly!
_________________
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 6:38 am 


User avatar

Joined: 08 Dec 2005
Posts: 18266
Location: uoıʇɐɹnƃıɟuoɔ ɯǝʇsʎs
xbl0x180 wrote:
I can't even boil water correctly, so it's take-out all day, every day 8)

BOILED WATER RECIPE

Put the water in the fuckin pot!

Turn the stove on, making sure you have the pot over the right burner or hot spot!

Fuckin wait until it's boiliin!

Yeah, you can get boil overs, but you don't need to worry about that much, especially if the stove is newer with a flat surface. So long as you aren't cookin' with gas you can afford a few experiments.

And some other dishes, like microwaved rice, don't require you to boil anything!


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 6:59 am 


User avatar

Joined: 28 Jan 2005
Posts: 1336
Location: USH
omuraisu - cheap and lazy edition

ingredients:
chicken
onion (or dried chopped onion from a #10 can)
ketchup or tomato powder (available in a #10 can)
white rice (possibly from a #10 can)
eggs (or powdered eggs from a #10 can)

step 1) divide chicken into bite-size pieces, put in pan, cook (in whatever order you like)
step 2) add rice, onion, tomato-y product, and water, cook some more
step 3a) prepare an omelet on a griddle, in a frypan, or on a plate in the microwave, then use the result of step 2 as filling for said omelet
step 3b) or if you can`t be bothered just add the eggs to everything else and call it good

PB&QO - no cooking required

ingredients:
peanut butter (might as well get a #10 can)
quick oats (#10 can!)
sugar (cheap), or imitation maple syrup (less cheap), or actual maple syrup or honey (not so cheap)

step 1) mix all that shit together
step 2) eat some and put the rest in the refrigerificator for later (it`s very filling)


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 7:13 am 


User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2008
Posts: 4698
Location: Springfield, Missouri, USA
Tonight I made my own protein bars! And it was easy! I kinda watched some bullshit youtube video, but I didn't really like all the garbage the dude put in it, so I spiced it up a bit with EXTRA PROTEIN.

2 cups whole grain oats
1 cup whey protein
1/3 cup craisins
Dab of cinnamon
Some bullshit honey
Chunky peanut butter. I put like 2 big ass spoonfulls 'cause I'm a hardass.
Skim milk extra. Until everything stuck together. Who knows how much. Doesn't matter.
Half a cup of chopped almonds.

Mix all that shit up. Put it in a pan. Make sure to spray that shit and put some wax paper unless you want to look like a fool. Put it in the refrigerator for at least 20 minutes. Continue to keep in there for whenever you want some.

NOW GET JACKED!

I probably went overboard with the peanut butter, but like I said, I'm a hardass. Almost put coconut in there, but that's extra fat, and I may be a hardass, but I don't wanna be a lardass.

GET SOME.
_________________
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 7:31 am 


User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2008
Posts: 4698
Location: Springfield, Missouri, USA
Here's some more bullshit I probably eat every day:

It's called "vegetables fuckin' suck but I eat them anyway."

WHAT YOU NEED:
-Shitty frozen vegetables from wal-mart
-Olive oil
-Egg whites, or actual eggs for you cholesterol freaks (it's cheaper)
-Optional: potatoes, onions, spices and stuff, salsa, sriracha.

Skillet. Turn that shit all the way up. Put some olive oil in there. Don't use vegetable oil you fucking dolt. Or any other bullshit oil. Shit sucks. Now pour a bunch of wal-mart mixed vegetables in the skillet. You can buy a huge ass bag for like 1.98 that will last you quite a few of these. Depends on how many vegetables you want. I usually cover the whole damned skillet. If you want to get REALLY wild you can chop up an onion. I do that sometimes, but that takes too long and I don't want to cry because crying is for WIMPS. At this time you could also put some potatoes or some pepper and spices and whatever in if you like "flavor".

Anyway, fry those bastards until they start jumping. You'll know it's almost done because the corn shoots out of the skillet at a thousand miles an hour and hurts like shit. You have to wear a shirt while you're making this. I've made that mistake too many times. So much corn up in my chest hair. Anyhow, when everything starts turning black and the corn starts flying and the pees look like shriveled testicles, then it's time to turn the heat down to about half.

Let it chill for a second. Don't jump the gun. Now, douse the whole damn thing in egg whites. Start scooting those abortions around so they don't burn. Be sure to chop it up with your spatula or kitchen utensil of choice so it doesn't turn into one of those fake rubber vomit toys.

Viola! You're done! If you want you can garnish it with whatever: sriracha, ketchup, mustard, whey protein.

GET HUGE.
_________________
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 8:32 am 


User avatar

Joined: 09 Mar 2007
Posts: 3107
Location: Cambridge
FUCKING AUBERGINE PASTA

Cube some aubergines and stick them in the fucking oven.

Get some pasta on the go.

Chop up some garlic.

Chop up some tomatoes.

Shove it all in a pan. Splish on some oil and chilli flakes. Heat it a bit. Shove on some yeast flakes, or Parmesan if you eat cheese.

FUCKING MASTERPIECE
_________________
ImageCurrently playing: Yakuza 0


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 3:56 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 6190
Goddamn Drauch, your whole diet is based off sriracha isn't it? It's ok, I think 30% of my diet is beer.


Randorama wrote:
EDIT: food processor? I can cut 2 kgs of zucchini to tiny pieces in 5 minutes, so no thanks. Cutting veggies is actually a good stress-releasing activity, objectively better than wanking off to lolis or ponies.


Dude, food processor isn't for chopping, its for making sauces and pastes. You can't turn a potato into sauce with a knife :)
_________________
Randorama wrote:
ban CMoon for being a closet Jerry Falwell cockmonster/Ann Coulter fan, Nijska a bronie (ack! The horror!), and Ed Oscuro being unable to post 100-word arguments without writing 3-pages posts.
Eugenics: you know it's right!


SHMUP sale page.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 5:21 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 21 Dec 2009
Posts: 2496
Location: internet
HERE SOME VEGAN SHIT THAT I USE TO CARB LOAD BEFORE CYCLING, YOU FAGGOTS.


Get some tempeh (8oz) from trader joes or somewhere else and split it, then quarter it.

marinate that shit in 1/2 cup tamari sauce, 1/2 cup lemon juice with chopped garlic (PUT GARLIC IN EVERYTHING) for a half hour.

WHILE THAT SHIT IS MARINATING, chop up some sweet potatoes into small cubes and boil them for about 10 minutes. Also, drink copious amounts of liquor.

preheat the oven to 350 F: throw the tempeh and potatoes on a oiled baking sheet with some veggies (green/yellow/red peppers, onion, mushrooms whatever the fuck you want) and bake them for 8 minutes, flip the tempeh and potatoes, then cook for another 7-9 minutes.

MAKE A BABY GREEN SALAD WITH SPINACH AND DRIZZLE IT WITH APPLE CIDER VINEGAR AND THROW SOME WALNUTS ON TOP.

SALT AND PEPPER THAT SHIT AND EAT IT.
_________________
lol


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 12:45 am 


User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2008
Posts: 4698
Location: Springfield, Missouri, USA
CMoon wrote:
Goddamn Drauch, your whole diet is based off sriracha isn't it? It's ok, I think 30% of my diet is beer.


Pretty much. It makes everything that is nasty taste better. You could probably put it on a turd and it'd taste pretty iight.
_________________
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 1:25 am 


User avatar

Joined: 16 Feb 2008
Posts: 5070
Location: toronto
CMoon wrote:
Regarding rice, I use a rice steamer, but if your doing this on the cheap, you don't need one. Also, you can easily make any number of fried rice dishes without steaming the rice at all. Just soak it for 30 minutes, strain, then add it into your stir fry whenever you add the vegetables.

I haven't really experimented with the whole fried rice thing, but to clarify, it would looks something like this:
-Soak rice
-Fry a couple diced onions in a couple tbs of cooking oil
-Turn heat to low / temper with various spices
-Start adding veggies, rice, meats of your choices. Sequence requires experimentation or reading.
-Room for a second round of spices.
-Cover and continue cooking until done.

One other trick if you are cooking indian food. If you are reheating a dish you can completely revitalize it by frying it in just a bit of oil and some garam marsala. Totally comes back to life.


Actually, the best way to make fried rice is to make the rice the night before; the starch is better. Learned that working in a thai restaurant for 3 years in my youth. The other reasoning for this is you should be flash cooking fried rice in a wok.

The way we did it for a large bowl of fried rice(my lunch but would probably feed 2-3 normal people if they were having a couple dishes):

THAI FRIED FUCKING RICE

STEP 1 - have your pre-made rice from the night before portioned and ready to go.

STEP 2 - Prep all your veggies/meats before you start cooking. You really should blanch your veg first too, so it's mostly cooked already. Chop the meat up fairly thinly so it cooks fast. You will also need an egg(optional)

STEP 3 - Have your sauces(soy, oyster sauce(crucial actually but you want just a splash or it will ruin it), hot, wha'eva) ready to go; a splash of chicken stock is nice too.

STEP 4 - Grab your wok, flip dat heat on and wait; you know it's ready to go when you splash some water in it and it pops.

STEP 5 - This is where timing comes into play; make sure all your shit is ready to go so you can start tossing it in, cuz once you start cooking, you will burn it if you dilly dally. Splash a little bit of cooking oil(couple table spoons?) and immediately toss in the egg, sans shell(optional :wink: ). whip dat shit around for a couple secs.

STEP 6 - Then toss in your meat. You need to be constantly moving this shit around or it and the egg will burn. It shouldn't take very long at all before the meat is cooked.

STEP 7 - Then toss in the veggies. Keep stirring dat mutha fucka! At this point start tossing in your sauces, but not too much, as you want to add some when you add the rice too. Did I mention keep stirring? Give it a few seconds till the veg starts steaming too.

STEP 8 - Now toss in the rice and a splash of chicken stock(Optional), but not too much or it gets all mushy like. Add a bit more of your sauces...KEEP FUCKING STIRRING NANCY!!

STEP 9 - Remove from heat and immediately get it the fuck out of the wok and into a bowl or serving plate. Garnish to taste, we usually used finely chopped green onions.

Enjoy bitches. If you do this right, it shouldn't take more than 2 minutes to cook, and you end up with fried rice like you would get in a restaurant. Easier with gas stoves, otherwise if you have a heating element stove, get a wok with a flat bottom. They aren't as good as the normal curved wok's but they work.


Also, I believe it was Drauch who mentioned he frys with Olive Oil; careful, it has a really low smoke point compared to more commonly used oils for frying(vegetable, peanut, etc.), so to properly cook food, you are basically ruining the oil, burning the flavour out of it.

Oh, and for chili; secret ingredient...... CRUSHED FUCKING WALNUTS!! Thanks for that one Brendz. Especially good for vegetarians and vegans. Adds a little more substance to the chili.

I rarely cook these day, the GF does most of that, but you guys might dig...

PASTA FUCKING SALAD!!!

STEP 1 - Grab a bag of Rotini, boil dat shit until it's al dente(still kind of hard; not crunchy, but still firm) and run under cold water when straining; this stops the pasta from cooking any further.

STEP 2 - Grab some veggies; we usually go with stuff like peppers(green, orange, yellow, wha'eva), zucchini, tomatoes, but really I guess you could put whatever. Chop dem shits up.

STEP 3 - Grab some basil/oregano/thyme(dry or fresh; fresh tastes better for this since its not being cooked at all), or if you are lazy, just grab some italian herb mix, chop dat shit up and mix it up with a bunch of olive oil( not too much, just enough to coat all your pasta/vegetables; you don't want the salad floating in it :wink: )

STEP 4 - OPTIONAL - Feta or any crumbly cheese; if you don't like cheese, well fuck you! I like lots of this is in it, but add to taste.

STEP 4 - Mix dat shit up in a big bowl, cover with cellophane and put it in the fridge over night; you can just put it in long enough to get cold, but it's better the next day when everything has kind of melded and absorbed the flavours.

If you use a whole bag of pasta and vegetables, you can easily get a few days out of this.

I'll post some more later. This shits making me hungry.

Awesome post CMoon!


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 1:50 am 


User avatar

Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 6190
When you say you prepare the rice the night before--you mean you soak it? steam it? ???

I've only made one stirred rice dish, so bring this shit on!
_________________
Randorama wrote:
ban CMoon for being a closet Jerry Falwell cockmonster/Ann Coulter fan, Nijska a bronie (ack! The horror!), and Ed Oscuro being unable to post 100-word arguments without writing 3-pages posts.
Eugenics: you know it's right!


SHMUP sale page.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:04 am 


User avatar

Joined: 21 Dec 2009
Posts: 2496
Location: internet
this thread fucking rules.


Used lentils for the first time tonight. Ready to bulk up.
_________________
lol


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:11 am 


User avatar

Joined: 16 Feb 2008
Posts: 5070
Location: toronto
CMoon wrote:
When you say you prepare the rice the night before--you mean you soak it? steam it? ???

I've only made one stirred rice dish, so bring this shit on!


Make it the night before with a rice cooker or steamer. We would then portion it out in serving sizes in tupperware containers. This way it will absorb the sauces without going mushy, and the extra starch keeps it from clumping.

Blanching the veg is also important, so all you are really doing is heating them up. Crucial for the flash fry technique. This is how most authentic asian wok style food should be cooked. You don't want to simmer. Especially for thai food, that often uses fruits like mango. This way the veg and stuff is still kind of crispy(not mushy anyway) but cooked.

Also, don't overdo it on the amounts for the ingredients. The rice should be like 2 cups max(cooked) and a large handful of veg. You don't want to overload the wok, or you cant stir it properly and it doesn't cook evenly.

Once you get the hang of this, it's an awesome meal, and super quick, especially if you have good knife skills for prepping. I'm not as good as I used to be, but I can prep the fuck out of vegetables quick time!


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:27 am 


User avatar

Joined: 28 Feb 2005
Posts: 1682
Location: Colin's Bargain Basement. Everything must go.
jonny5's house= awesome place to get fed. True story.
_________________
ImagePegasus Wings Special STGT2012 1CCS
RegalSin wrote:
STIDER is not Metal Gear


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:56 am 



Joined: 25 Oct 2007
Posts: 1403
I suck at cooking, but one of my favorite low-hassle cheap "dishes" is lentils + brown rice + whatever stupid veggies I have in the freezer:

Boil some water (of which more anon) in a big-ass pot.

Stir in the lentils+rice first, turn down the heat enough to let them settle, then throw the still-frozen veggies on top.

Boil it covered over low heat for ~45 minutes or until edible (cooking time may be shorter if you don't live 6000 feet above the ocean, where elevated exposure to solar and cosmic radiation causes stove cancer).

DO NOT OPEN THE LID (go stumble around on Wikipedia or do a shmup run or something; that's part of the appeal of this technique) until it's almost done, at which point you can stir it to try to even things out a bit.

The main trick is getting the amount of water right, which depends a bit on the stove's actual heat level and how much your pot lid sucks. Start with about 2x the lentil+rice volume + 1/2 cup and go from there, and subtract a bit if you're throwing in a bunch of freezer frost with the veggies. If it's boiled totally dry when you open the lid instead of having delicious boiling sludge on the bottom, you can add some more water and cook it a bit longer to try to salvage it. Flavor with whatever the fuck you like, or substitute soup stock for water if you're into that sort of thing.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 11:11 am 


User avatar

Joined: 11 Jul 2011
Posts: 1623
Location: On an alternate dimension... filled with bullets and moon runes...
Gazpacho (cold vegetable soup) Recipe.

It's easy and healthy, you can keep it cool on the fridge a lot of time and it's an instant "salad". You can drink it as an apetizer or whenever you want.

Ingredients (for 8-10 servings):

1 Kg of Tomatoes (be sure to grab some tender and juicy ones)
400 gr of cucumbers
400 gr of green pepper
200 gr of onions
2 garlics
200 gr of bread (even if it's old and dry bread... NOT MOLDY)
50 ml of Olive Oil (preferably extra virgin)
25 ml of Vinegar (preferably sherry vinegar)
salt and cool water.

You can make variations on the proportions to suit your tastes (specially the garlic, since a lot of "northerners" doesn't like the taste of it) but the tomatoes must allways be the main vegetable.

Preparation:

Take all of the vegetables and the bread, cut then in chunks and macerate then in the oil and vinegar for about a night. you can skip the maceration but keep in mind that the taste won't be as good. The next day take everything, add some cool water and crush everything with a blender or a similar machine. once it's crushed, taste it and add more water/vinegar/salt/oil if you'd like.

Once you like what you got, strain it in a colander.

There you have it. Maintain it cool on the fridge and with one or 2 glasses a day you should fulfill your daily intake of vegetables. Plus it's delicious and refreshing.

Tip: you can add little bits of vegetables and/or fried bread to the soup as toppings.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 11:57 am 


User avatar

Joined: 07 Apr 2011
Posts: 3707
Location: Toronto
Sly Cherry Chunks wrote:
jonny5's house= awesome place to get fed. True story.


All I ever get there is frozen samosas :cry:
_________________
Chris Mixcloud // Sales Thread
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 12:04 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 3090
Location: Latis / Netherlands
Image

At about 10 cents per 70 gram sausage... nothing beats a frikandel in both value for money as far as meat goes.
The fact that it's delicious makes it even better. :P
_________________
Barroom hero!
Bathroom hero!


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 12:46 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 16 Feb 2008
Posts: 5070
Location: toronto
shmuppyLove wrote:
Sly Cherry Chunks wrote:
jonny5's house= awesome place to get fed. True story.


All I ever get there is frozen samosas :cry:


You mean awesome frozen samosas :wink:

and beerz 8)

I'm usually too busy playing games to cook anyway. :lol:


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 4:00 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 03 Feb 2008
Posts: 665
Location: Grand Rapids, MI
Ex-Cyber wrote:
I suck at cooking, but one of my favorite low-hassle cheap "dishes" is lentils + brown rice + whatever stupid veggies I have in the freezer.


That's more or less my go to thing, but I always use black beans, just not a big lentil fan.


Clean out your fucking fridge beans and rice:

put some black beans in a pot to simmer, cook up some diced onions and bacon if you've got it and toss them in with the beans

Make a few cup of rice in a rice cooker. I use jasmine rice, it's a little more expensive but worth it. Shits tasty, get it from a asian market or prepare to pay way to much.

On the stove saute up whatever veggies you've got with some olive oil and garlic
toss is whatever sort of meat you feel like, spicy sausage is goood

when everything's done stir it all together

eat that shit all week
if you need something more to fill you up cook a egg over easy and set on top of your bowl of rice n shit.
_________________
XBL - CountryGolden
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 10:22 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 07 Apr 2011
Posts: 3707
Location: Toronto
Image

This thread should never leave page 1
_________________
Chris Mixcloud // Sales Thread
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 11:59 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 08 Dec 2005
Posts: 18266
Location: uoıʇɐɹnƃıɟuoɔ ɯǝʇsʎs
You know, I got the microwave thing down to less than 10 minutes this time - put it on for 15 but turned it off with 6 to go. Not exactly done, despite all the water - it's got a consistency more like wild rice (like there's a husk surrounding the inside), so more water and another 5 minutes should do it. Edible though.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 9:25 am 


User avatar

Joined: 26 May 2010
Posts: 532
here´s the 3 basics plates I eat,Im hyper cheap and not a chief so this is acceptable:

da ultra simple salade:
corn+tuna+sauce:1min
can add rice if you have time to cook,can add cheese too.

rice+thinly slice bacon:can eat hot or cold with sauce or no sauce or cheese.

carbonara pasta:pasta+thinly slice bacon+fresh cream and personnally I put onions in are they are amazing.
sauce is cooked while rice is cooked.
thats fat not to eat everyday.

for survivors you still have ramens.

other dishes are more evolved and dont belong in this thread I guess.

yes Im a barbarian.

edit:chutney>curry imo
_________________
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lqa58kED ... verified=1

my hipster friends new clip


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 6:25 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 07 Apr 2011
Posts: 3707
Location: Toronto
Shit I realized I was doing it wrong

Image

Apologies
_________________
Chris Mixcloud // Sales Thread
Image


Last edited by shmuppyLove on Tue Jul 17, 2012 12:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 10:01 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 6190
A few bullshit pro-tips and a revelation (I think I earned a trophy):

1) Grocery stores are never the cheapest places to buy food. Now I'm not saying to go dumpster diving, but jesus, some of the asian markets go out of their way to undercut each other. Just found a thai asian market that carries that goddamn curry paste (see my first recipe and below) for half the price of the chinese market. And they let you buy it in bulk muthafukka! Also, I wanted to use bean sprouts in my curry--1/4 the price at the thai market compared to my local grocery store. It's like the food black market!

2) I know I mentioned Mae Ploy before. Holy shit, if you like making thai curries, go buy this shit. It's cheap. It's what the restaurants use, and it is super easy:

Image

Anyway, I was picking up 2 lb tubs of this shit at the thai shop for pennies on the dollar. Or go eat your goddamn mac & cheesu.

3) Pressure cookers. So I'm cooking up a green curry, tossing in every f'n vegetable I have left in the fridge and realize this $15 wok I bought used at an Indian market had no lid. No way to simmer that shit for an hour. Fuck it, toss it all in the pressure cooker for 20 minutes and it does the same job (or 6 hours in the sloooooow cooker.) Getting a fucking huge wok probably belongs on any bachelors list of purchases, but the pressure cooker completely routed the delima. If you can afford a pressure cooker (like dude, don't buy so many pcbs and buy a fucking wok and a fucking pressure cooker), you should get one.

4) OK, obvious but if you have any friends with their own houses, get them growing vegetables and shit for you. Put on your best little tramp face. Fill up my fucking trunk with all your free produce. Homeowners love to give their shit away. Show up looking hungry and you will walk away like a king.
_________________
Randorama wrote:
ban CMoon for being a closet Jerry Falwell cockmonster/Ann Coulter fan, Nijska a bronie (ack! The horror!), and Ed Oscuro being unable to post 100-word arguments without writing 3-pages posts.
Eugenics: you know it's right!


SHMUP sale page.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 11:12 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 10 Feb 2010
Posts: 869
Not my recipe. Taken from Reddit.com. electricsandwich has really outdoes himself in this post: (http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comme ... so/c0ssm6d)

###Begin transmission###
Take a lesson from the Puerto Ricans. Millions of us have managed to survive in one of the most expensive cities on earth with recipes like this:

Find a supermarket that has black beans on sale. Buy as much as you can. Then buy 5 or so pounds of Carolina rice, a bag of onions, a few bulbs of garlic, and a box of Goya Sazon.

Set 2 cups of water to boil

Dick around on reddit until the water is boiling

Throw in one cup of rice, turn the heat down to simmer and lid that shit

Slice up a small onion

Smash up a clove of garlic

Throw some olive oil or butter into a HOT pan.

Throw the onions and garlic into the pan and fry them till the onion gets glassy. Throw some salt in there.

Grind some pepper in there for good luck.

Toss in half a packet of Sazon and stir till you get a paste. Now you have a ghetto sofrito.

Dump in your can of beans bean juice and all.

Stir that shit up.

Add a pinch of Cayenne pepper so you remember that you have a set of cojones

Set that shit on simmer

Your rice is done.

Throw the beans on top.

Win

You should get at least 2 meals out of one can of beans, and if your lucky you can get black beans 2 for $1. Adding the cost of the Garlic, Sazon and a small onion and you still eat a tasty, hearty, relatively healthy meal for less than $1.

Now. You are a growing lad. You need MEAT

OK, first of all, fuck eating lips and assholes. There is a much, much tastier option that has kept millions of starving boriquas alive for generations: PORK SHOULDER.

In my neighborhood in Brooklyn, Pork shoulder is 79 cents a pound. That's right. 79 cents. A package of hot dogs at $2.50 is more than double the price and has offal and all sorts of vile shit inside.

Buy yourself a nice meaty pork shoulder. 5 lbs should do nicely.

Bring that fucker home and get out a long, thin knife.

In a pilon (that's a mortar and pestle gringo) smash up a few cloves of Garlic, some sazon, some, salt, some pepper, and some oil. Grind it up GOOD. Now you have another ghetto sofrito.

Take your knife and stab some holes in the pig. Twist the knife around so the holes get nice and wide.

Now, take some of your sofrito and stuff it into the holes. Don't be shy blanco, ram it in there. Use the remainder to roughly coat the outside of the pig. RUB IT. CARESS IT. This pig died so that you may eat. Salt that shit all over the outside and crack some fucking pepper on there.

Set your oven for ~300 degrees

Throw the pork in skin side up and WAIT.

It's going to take like 45 minutes a pound...

A warning: The smell is going to drive you fucking INSANE. You have to wait this part out. Farm work is the best cure.

After an an hour and a half, jab it with a meat thermometer, but remember to not rest it on the bone, or you will get a bad reading.

You should be at around 150-160 degrees. Now comes the fun part. CRANK the stove up to 400 degrees. This will give you an orgasmic, crispy skin that will make your pork rinds taste like year old carboard comparison.

At 170 ish? Pull that fucker out, but DON'T carve it up. You need to wait at least ten minutes otherwise all those sweet, sweet pig juices will dribble the fuck out. WAIT.

Congratulations. You just made Pernil. A five pound Pernil should give you meat for at least a week. SAVOR IT BROTHER. SAVOR IT

Edit: Forgot the best and cheapest fucking recipe!!!

TOSTONES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck me. Green plaintains are usually like 5 for a fucking dollar!

Here's my mom's recipe:

Fry up some bacon. Set the bacon aside and save that lovely, glistening fat.

Take a plantain and run a knife down the side and split the skin off without breaking the plantain. This takes a bit of practice.

Slice up the plantain into ~1/3 inch thick slices. Throw them into a bowl of ice water.

You have a fry daddy? You're golden papi. No? Pour around half an inch of oil into a frying pan. Corn oil works best, olive oil smokes too easily. Get that shit hot! Throw in your bacon grease.

Take your sliced up plantains out of the ice water and drain them or even pat them with a paper towel till they're dry.

Fry em up until they just turn golden.

Throw them in the freezer for 10 minutes.

Now, here is where you become a MAN: Get yourself a flat bottom glass and a cutting board or a plate. Throw some flour on there. Smash the plantains with the cup. You may need a spatula to get them off the board...

Fry em AGAIN until they are golden and crispy

Make all three of these things together and you have an incredibly delicious and cheap meal!

*TLDR; Learn the lessons of my people: The Nuyoricans. (New York Puerto Ricans) We have survived for DECADES on no money in one of the most expensive cities on the planet. *
_________________
Image
Click here for STG Weekly! (YouTube Show for Shmups)


Last edited by Frenetic on Tue Jul 17, 2012 12:46 am, edited 1 time in total.

Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 11:45 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 6190
Thanks, this gringo has to learn what sazon and sofrito are.
_________________
Randorama wrote:
ban CMoon for being a closet Jerry Falwell cockmonster/Ann Coulter fan, Nijska a bronie (ack! The horror!), and Ed Oscuro being unable to post 100-word arguments without writing 3-pages posts.
Eugenics: you know it's right!


SHMUP sale page.


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The lonely videogamer's guide to cheap cooking
PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 12:15 pm 


User avatar

Joined: 07 Apr 2011
Posts: 3707
Location: Toronto
One correction:

Frenetic wrote:
Play Mushi until the water is boiling


Fix'd
_________________
Chris Mixcloud // Sales Thread
Image


Top
 Offline Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 117 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: BIL, Cannonballs, Obscura and 4 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Space Pilot 3K template by Jakob Persson
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group